Page 58 of The Night Ride
“I thought you might join me in the shower.”
I lifted my gaze and looked at him then.“I wanted to but thought it best if I didn’t.”
He studied me a moment and nodded.“I understand.You didn’t have to do this.”
He meant more than breakfast.
Pasting a smile I didn’t feel, I said, “And what kind of hostess would I be if I didn’t send you off with a hearty breakfast.”
There were scrambled eggs with cheddar and Monterey jack cheese, bacon, biscuits and sausage gravy, and strawberries.
“It’s quite the spread.I don’t know how you find the time to make biscuits so quickly.”
“I’m just that good.”When the reality was, I kept dough and gravy frozen in batches in the freezer, making it easy to pull out and heat, or in the case of the gravy, reheat.They were simple tricks I’d learned in culinary school.It saved time and effort when I was really busy since running a business took a lot of work.And I liked having a good meal.
We ate in silence.
“Beth, I—it’s wrong of me to even ask for you to consider waiting until I’m ready.I have to finish this mission and my time with the Navy.”
I put a hand on his arm.“I know.And we don’t know where this path leads.I understand you need to finish up your career and that you don’t trust me enough because of her.I want to say I’ll wait, but a lot can happen in two years, Aiden.I’m doing the best I can to honor the parameters you set forth for our relationship, but I deserve to have someone in my life who wants to be there.I know your job is risky.I know that loneliness can play a factor.My brother was married twice and wasn’t remotely faithful to either one.Regardless of whether we come together again, know I will love you until the day I die.Deep down I know you’re it for me.I tried not loving you, burying my feelings for you, but they never went away.I’ll look for your face in every crowd and see your smile in every sunrise.You’re the love of my life.I understand you have to do this, and I love you for it.And when you leave, you’ll take a part of me with you.I won’t ever experience another thunderstorm and not think of you.”
He rose and yanked me up into his arms.I wrapped mine around his shoulders, holding him close.Feeling his heartbeat within his chest.I inhaled him deeply, wondering how I was going to survive this when it felt as if my heart was tearing into millions of jagged pieces.
“I better go.Beth, I wish things were different.”
“Be safe,” I murmured against his neck, fighting back the tears clogging my throat.
He lifted his head and cupped my nape, his mouth claimed mine for one final kiss.It was tender and ripped my still beating heart to shreds.
He disengaged first.I didn’t know how I kept myself upright as he grabbed his pack and headed outside.I followed him to the door.And stood there with the door open while he stowed his pack and climbed on his Harley.He settled the helmet on his head, started the motor, and then looked at me.
I plastered a smile and lifted my hand in goodbye.
He gave me a chin nod, his eyes somber.And then he drove away as swiftly as he entered my life with the wings of fate.
I barely got the door closed before my heart shattered and I collapsed onto the floor as grief swallowed me whole.
Because Aiden Miller was the loss of my life.
Chapter nineteen
Shakenmorethananyraid I’d been on in my military career, I drove away from Beth’s place questioning myself.Did I really need to rejoin Lucas and Wyatt?Our last communication put them in California already.I sincerely doubted that their visit with Paige would take long before they headed up north to Evan and Beth’s baby sister Nora.Would it be better if I stayed with Beth and joined them on the return journey?
But what good would it do when the result would be the same?
I merged onto Insterstate 44 and headed west.
Yet I didn’t want to leave her.She was the best damn thing to ever happen to me.This small slice of time with her had been epic.She was the most giving and loving woman.
What could I even offer her?A townhome that was owned by the government.A man who was away from his country more often than he was in it.
Love.
It hit me like a semi-truck.
Shit.
I was in love with Beth.
