Page 29 of Finding Haven
I think part of the feeling stems from how little I have shared with her. I want to tell her everything, but there’s a voice in the back of my mind screaming at me to keep it all buried. I can’t divulge any informationuntil I know with absolute certainty that Quinn’s nothing like the woman who left me broken and bitter, the woman who has been haunting my dreams since the night I met Quinn at the bar. It’s been a long time since my ex has played a role in my nightmares, and I thought I’d finally managed to escape her. Meeting Quinn and the light she’s brought into my life seem to have triggered the shadows.
In spite of all of the conversations we’ve had so far and everything we discussed last night, we didn’t approach the topic ofus. I told her she's mine, and that holds more meaning to me than any label ever could. What I feel for her, the way my heart, body, and soul seem to recognize hers, goes beyond anything else I’ve ever known.
Still, I wasn’t prepared for the nightmares to take hold the way that they did. I wasn’t prepared for the dreams that were filled with the delicious sounds of Quinn’s moans to suddenly transform into the harsh screams of a woman I hope to never see again.
I woke up in a cold sweat with my heart pounding in my chest, ragged breaths dragging through my lungs as I desperately tried to decipher delirium from reality. By the time my mind settled, the sun was making its ascent over the horizon, painting the sky in the dusky shades of dawn.
Will and Lara Anders, Ace’s parents, are hosting a barbecue today for members of The Phoenix Legion. Nerves immediately began to build in my stomach as soon as the nightmares subsided, and I didn’t see the point in trying to go back to sleep. My mind has been racing ever since, attempting to comb through every possible scenario and outcome that may play out today.
It’s just a casual event, nothing to stress over, and yet the people who will be in attendance don’t exactly have the most mundane jobs. Quinntold me that she was working at the bakery this morning, helping Chelsea with catering the desserts and all that entails for an event. An event that I failed to mention I would be at. I’m not the least bit ashamed of the work that the Legion does, but it would be foolish of me to assume that she will immediately be accepting of my career.
The Anders family home, the location for today’s little get-together, is a large white two-story home with dark wooden French entry doors. The place sits on a spacious piece of land that overlooks a private beach, the land around the home covered by a trimmed grass lawn with large shade trees scattered around the property. The back of the yard has been fully designed with hosting in mind, complete with a stone courtyard and fire pit.
Despite being here as a guest and not just an employee, I still take my protective role seriously and make it a point to be among the first to arrive, second only to Ace. Having this many Legion members in one place alongside civilians seems like a recipe for disaster, but Ace has assured me that both Ethan and Chelsea are part of the inner circle. The only outsider still in question is Quinn, but if things continue to grow between us, she won’t be an outsider for much longer. I just have no idea how to approach the subject with her.
What if she completely loses her shit the way Tiffany so often would when she didn’t approve of something I was doing? What if she turns her back on me and what we’ve started to build between us?
This right here is why I’ve steered clear of any potential relationships over the years. I have no desire to be wrapped up in that kind of abuse again. I won’t do it. Ican’tdo it. Every piece of herself that Quinn hasshown me leads me to believe that she’s nothing like my ex, but that doesn’t ease the fear or wariness taking hold of my body.
“Hey, man,” Ace says, clapping a hand on my shoulder and pulling me from the depths of my mind. “Chels is here. I’m gonna head out there and help her and Quinn get everything unloaded. You alright?”
I brush his hand off my shoulder, stepping away from him. “I’m fine,” I grunt. “I just don’t think it’s smart to have them here.”Because I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to hide this piece of myself with Quinn being surrounded by so many fucking assassins.
She’s safe here. There’s no safer place in the world right now for her or Chelsea, or anyone else in attendance, than right here, immersed in a sea of professional killers. Nobody here would ever let any harm come to the innocent. Our sole purpose as an organization is to protect those who can’t protect themselves.
The barbecue is in full swing by the time I finally manage to force some of the tension from my body. It’s rare to have so many members in one place. I need to take advantage of it and seek out Shadow, Ghost, and Blaze about their current assignments. Each member has a code name, and I’ve made it a habit over the years not to use their real names. It provides enough of a disconnect for me to not allow myself to form too deep of a connection. The three of them are one hell of a team and take on most contracts as a unit, each of them providing their own unique skill set. They’re typically given the more high-profile kills that requiremore finesse and discretion. The ones that aren’t as easy to brush under the rug as an accident that the public will forget about.
I’m not surprised when I find them huddled together at the far edge of the yard, away from any other Legion members, each with a drink in hand.
“Planning a vacation when your target hasn’t even been handled yet?” I say, not bothering with a proper greeting as I step into their circle.
“I fuckin’ wish,” Shadow groans, raising his red plastic cup to his lips and throwing back what's left of his drink.
“We’re gonna check out the clubs on the list you sent over. See if we can catch this fucker in the act,” Ghost says, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet.
“You know damn well it ain’t gonna be that easy,” Blaze barks. “Shit’s never that easy.”
“Still gives us an excuse to enjoy a night out.” Ghost shrugs, his eyes darting briefly in Shadow’s direction. The tension between them is damn near palpable. There aren't any restrictions against members being involved with one another, but given the risks associated with the job and the level of targets they deal with, I can't imagine anything beyond a casual relationship being feasible.
Their current target is a government official who’s using money and fame to hide his more disturbing hobbies. The amount of shit that someone with money can get away with is ludicrous. If good ol’ neighborly Joe Smith was luring women to his home, taking them against their will, and murdering them afterwards, he would be behind bars without question. When that person is known around the world for their career in the spotlight, has a net worth most people will never see in their entirelifetime, and has mastered a friendly persona, their gruesome activities are often overlooked until it’s too late.
That’s where The Phoenix Legion comes into play, and these three are the perfect assassins to handle the job without drawing any attention to themselves.
“Just let me know if you run into any issues with the intel,” I tell them, my gaze scanning over the surrounding crowd in search of Quinn. The last thing I need is for her to overhear this kind of conversation.
22
Quinn
WhiletheAnders’homeis absolutely stunning, this event is far more casual than I had anticipated. Chelsea had referred to it many times as just a low-key barbecue, but I still somehow expected more from a family who owns a luxurious hotel chain. This whole event is such a contradiction to the image they portray to the public.
Everyone here seems so comfortable with each other, but there’s no way that they all work at the hotel. It’s not like an entire hotel could be shut down simply so the family can host a personal event off-premises. But then, where did all of these people come from? Chelsea told me that this was a work event for Austin’s family, but that was the only detail she gave.
Looking around at everyone here, I get the feeling that we aren’t even supposed to be here. I feel so incredibly out of place. I’ve been staying near the dessert table setup in case anyone has a question about the treats we brought. There’s a wide assortment of brownies, cookies, mini bundt cakes, and a larger carrot bundt cake, all specially requested by Austin’s mom, Lara Anders.
She was the first person to greet us when we arrived and didn’t hesitate to pull Chelsea into her arms, gushing happily about something. As much as I wanted to eavesdrop, it felt like a private moment. Instead,I busied myself with unloading the catering van that Hailey loaned us from the Elysian; A place I’ve been dying to visit again now that I know Zack has been my secret subscriber all along. Would he be opposed to me surprising him at work?
We’ve yet to even establish what this is between us. I’ve never been the type to get involved with casual relationships. Every time I’ve tried, it’s done nothing except leave me feeling hollow. I want so much more from Zack than a hot, passionate fling. I just don’t know if we’re on the same page. Last night was incredible. It was everything I could have ever hoped for. The way he took control and didn’t hesitate to dominate my body has me craving more of him, his touch, his words, whatever he’s willing to give me.
