Page 61 of Head First
And then she sat straight up and said, ‘Well, we’d just better figure out a way to get you two to the last act.’ She downs the last sip of her wine before she continues.
‘First of all,’ Pippa says, ticking off items on her fingers, ‘I’ll keep an eye on Natalie. If she brings up anything about you being fishy . . .’ Pippa pauses and winks at me. ‘Get it?’
I nod, rolling my eyes.
‘If she brings up anything, I’ll shut it down immediately. Cool?’
‘That would be great.’ I heave a sigh of relief. I should have told Pippa sooner. She rocks.
‘Secondly,’ she continues, ‘you’re going to find this fish. We have one more dive. It’s meant to be, I can feel it in my bones.’ She reaches to give my hand a squeeze. ‘Believe in yourself, babes,’ she says brightly. ‘No one else is going to do it for you. Well, except me. I believe in you too.’
She doesn’t wait for me to respond before continuing. ‘Thirdly, and most importantly, is your situation with Hugh. I know you don’t want to admit it, but he did hit the nail on the head with the confidence stuff. Who cares if you’re not your sister? You’re YOU. He. Likes. YOU. Show up as who you are and be proud of it. Don’t let your insecurities get in the way. You should tell him the truth.’
‘But I’ve been lying, Pippa. In every conversation. I act like I’m a marine biologist, like I live this exciting life, like I’m someone who would be compatible with Hugh and I’m just . . . not.’
‘But you are living an exciting life,’ Pippa points out, ‘and you can’t use that as an excuse to lie to someone.’
‘But what if he uses it against Millie?’
We run this conversation in circles until Andrew knocks on the door and sheepishly asks if he can get ready for bed. Reluctantly, I slink back to my room, but not before thanking Pippa profusely.
‘You’re the best, Pip,’ I whisper as I hug her goodnight.
‘Get some rest, and try not to get seduced again.’ She winks. Then she giggles. ‘Andi,’ she whispers so quietly I barely hear her. I swat at her arm. ‘Shh!’ I hiss, but it feels nice to hear someone call me by my actual name and I can hear her giggling as I walk back to my room.
The lights are off in the room, and Hugh is nowhere to be found. I climb onto my bed and curl up under the covers, the wine making me feel oddly detached.
I wake up what feels like every hour, my head spinning. I remind myself that even though Hugh was right about some things, it doesn’t mean I have to tell him the truth. The guy lives in Australia.Why would I put myself through an impossibly hard conversation with potentially disastrous consequences for something with no future?
The last thing I remember before drifting off into a fitful sleep is that when Hugh comes in the room to go to bed, he whispers, ‘Goodnight, Millie.’
I wake up to the rolling of the ship. We are already moving, undoubtedly heading towards Fitzroy Island. Suddenly, I can’t wait to get off the boat and out of these cramped quarters. I scurry down from my bunk. Hugh is still asleep, his mouth slightly open, his perfect, plump bottom lip looking extremely kissable. A shiver runs down my spine as I remember where his lips were yesterday. I steal out of the room before he wakes up to find me looming over him like a lovesick puppy.
If I’m not going to have the guts to tell him, maybe I can get through today with minimal Hugh contact. Then I have one more dive, and I’ll be home free. I grab a coffee and sit on the platform, the breeze ruffling through my hair. Aaron is already gunning full speed towards a green mountain in the distance. It’s the only land around, and the only land we’ve seen in days. I feel a burst of joy at the prospect of finally getting off the boat. Fitzroy Island, here we come.
Fitzroy Island is a lush green mound in the middle of the sparkling aquamarine of the Pacific Ocean. It looks small from far away, but the closer we get, the larger it looms over the horizon. As we approach land, everyone clusters on deck, craning their necks to watch the white sand get closer and closer. If I thought Cairns looked like paradise, Fitzroy is ten times as beautiful. There’s one lone dock jutting out from the beach, rickety and wooden, and we are the only boat as far as the eye can see. The island looks so untouched and uninhabited that I’m beginning to wonder if there is even a turtle sanctuary.
Vanessa sets down her coffee and picks up her clipboard.
‘We hike first,’ she explains, ‘then we take our trip to the turtle sanctuary, which is where we eat lunch, then we have a couple hours at the beach, then we’re back on the boat in time for a late dinner. Cool?’
‘Cool,’ the group echoes.
Aaron lugs a large container upstairs, the bin where we all placed our shoes, and everyone grabs their sandals.
Pippa clears her throat. ‘Is the hiking, um, hard?’ she asks tentatively. She wriggles her toes, which are painted a bright pink. ‘I only have flip-flops.’
‘It’s not really a hike.’ Vanessa sighs, as if she wishes that weren’t the case. ‘We’re just going to the top of the island.’ She gestures towards the mountain in front of us.
Pippa’s jaw drops.
Vanessa bursts out laughing. ‘I’m joking! We’ll be walking to the neighbouring beach. Then we’ll take a van to the top of the mountain on our way to the turtle sanctuary.’
Everyone visibly relaxes, including Natalie, who takes the opportunity to pull out her phone and start waving it around in the air, trying to get signal.Millie, I think. I get up, ready to scramble downstairs and grab my phone. Just as I’m at the top of the stairs, Vanessa calls to Natalie, ‘No use doing that. There’s no service here.’
My heart sinks. I turn around and make my way back to the bench, settling down next to Pippa. She gives me a sympathetic look. ‘I’m sorry. Just one more day, then you’ll be able to talk to her. I’m sure she’s fine,’ she says, patting my knee gently.
‘I’m just ready to be off this boat,’ I complain.
