Page 78 of Apple of My Eye
‘Damn,’ Julian breathes. ‘What changed?’
‘I don’t know, we just both agreed to ignore it, but if she thinks I’m putting her future in jeopardy of for a stupid bet .?.?.’
‘Well, you are,’ Isaac points out. ‘Aren’t you?’
‘I mean, no .?.?.’ But I have to pause to think about it. Am I? I thought all this time I was doing it for the Parkers. Or I was doing it for school. Ihadto do a good job. What kind of a person would I be if I slacked off? But the more I think about it the more uncertain I feel. Why was I so sure that what I was doing was right? But I am right .?.?. aren’t I? The Parkers deserve a chance to succeed.
Thoughts swirl in my head all night long. I text her again, telling her I can explain if she’ll just let me. No response.
I toss and turn, wondering if I did the right thing, wondering if Eloise will forgive me, wondering when exactly I started to care so much about what she thinks .?.?.
At least Isaac and Julian don’t know about Scott’s Orchards. If Eloise found out about that from them it would be beyond forgiveness. I’ll have to tell her. The thought alone fills me with so much dread I spend the rest of the night staring at the ceiling.
When the rooster crows in the morning, I’ve already been up for hours.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Eloise
A Few of My Favorite Things When I’m Feeling Bad (à la Julie Andrews)
–Sweatshirts so worn in they have holes (preferably Dad’s)
–A hug from Mom
–The NotebookorDead Poets Society(different vibes, same tear-jerk quality)
–Quilts
–Bright copper kettles (with chamomile tea)
–Drawn blackout shades
Evan sent me to bed promising that a night of sleep would help diminish my anger. It didn’t. I’m so angry at breakfast that I’m seeing red. I can’t believe I took my eye off the ball. This was supposed to be the most important harvest of my life, my chance to give my parents a feasible option to keep the farm, and I’ve been distractedly hiding away in barns and basements instead of working hard.
‘What do you want to do?’ he asks between bites of cereal.
‘Hit him with your car,’ I reply truthfully. ‘I wish I hadn’t lied for him to his friends,’ I mutter. ‘I should have just told them he hates football. All this, for a bet? I can’t believe it.’
‘Can you repeat that?’ Evan asks. ‘I’m so sorry. I can’t hear you over my chewing.’
‘Let’s talk about it later,’ I mumble, hearing Mom’s footsteps echoing in the hall.
‘Another busy day today,’ Mom trills as she walks into the kitchen.
I groan. The last thing I want to do is put on a fake smile and welcome people to the farm, but I’ll have to grin and bear it.
‘I got you.’ Evan squeezes my hand. ‘We’re in this together.’
‘Thank you,’ I mouth. I don’t feel like explaining what happened to my mom—especially seeing as she’s the kind of person who would want me to forgive Nick, which is the last thing I want to be told to do.
‘Remember that time you stayed up with me all night while I learned the names of fancy wines so I could work at that restaurant?’ Evan asks. ‘Think of it as payback for that.’
‘Except you’ll still owe me,’ I say, a hint of a smile playing at my lips, ‘because you never even took that job. So, the all-nighter was a complete waste.’
‘So true. ‘Evan smiles. ‘Hindsight’s twenty-twenty.’
‘It sure fucking is.’
