Page 73 of You Had Me At Pumpkin Patch
Because like a Magic Eye picture that you couldn’t unsee, Rosie couldn’tunfeelthis thing that had been growing inside her.
You deserve your own starring role, Rosie Featherstone,she’d typed on her screen.Now GET OUT THERE. Face the awkward bits. Be honest. Embrace real life, exist outside the pages of a book... and don’t be afraid to create your own, gloriously messy story – with or without pumpkins.
Tears were falling as she read. The typed words were probably a jumble of things she’d subconsciously known – but they’d needed to spin dry in her mind before they came together, like neatly paired socks. Her thoughts were right. The best bookish protagonists got out there and faced things. They scaled walls or galloped off on horses or marched fearlessly across stormy moors. They allowed their lives to get wild and untamed, in pursuit of what they felt in their hearts.
Whatever the outcome, she was ready to try.
‘Chicken noodles with cheese?’ Her sister popped her head around the door, holding a bowl of something particularly smelly.
Flick barged in anyway, placing the bowl next to Rosie’s laptop and sinking into an armchair. As was customary, she was already pulling out her phone.
‘Before you have a go at me and remind me to wash, Iamgoing to do something about my#lifeproblems. I have a plan. Want to hear it?’
‘Want to hear it? I want to be in it!’ Flick sat up straight. ‘Spill the news.’
Rosie’s brow creased, imagining her sister begging to livestream Rosie’s plight. She would be vetoing that – but there were a few things she needed help with.
As Rosie shared her game plan, her sister prodded her phone.
‘You’re not posting about this on your socials,’ Rosie warned.
‘Obviously,’ said Flick, apparently tapping onto Instagram anyway. ‘Promise I won’t, but... wow. There are a lot of people sending you love and luck after my livestream earlier. Some of them seem to know you.’
Rosie snatched the phone from her sister. ‘Let me see.’
As she scrolled, Rosie saw reams of supportive messages – many from total strangers, but some from friends past and present. Bonnie, Luna and the swim ladies begged her to get in touch. Even some of her old colleagues from KJ Marketing said the new chatbot software didn’t write about tooth decay nearly as well as she did, nor did it buy tasty cakes.
Rosie had already decided she was ready to step up and stop hiding – but even superheroines needed a boost.
Then her eyes landed on the most recent comment. It was from a brand-new user, with no profile picture.Zain K. Just seeing his name sent her insides swirling. And when Rosie read his suggestion to talk, she knew it was time to get moving – whatever the outcome.
‘Give me twenty minutes, then phase one of this plan is kicking off.’
Flick jumped up and gave a little hip wiggle. ‘You know, you once laughed at me for having a 4x4, even though I would never get it muddy. But let me tell you, it’s pretty spacious. I could fit several inanimate bodies in the back of that thing.’
‘Good to know,’ said Rosie. ‘But we’ll be leaving the dead-legs behind.’
47
The look on Cassius’s face when he opened the door to the flat Rosie used to share with him in Cybourne Road was priceless. Of course, she could have used her old key card or even her Boots points card to waltz straight in. But no part of her wanted to witness a naked man getting jiggy with a robot, ever again.
‘You’re live on Instagram, so please do not swear. And I really hope you’re not shagging androids this time, you big, geeky perv.’ Flick’s head popped up over Rosie’s shoulder, her phone camera trained on Cassius’s face.
Flick was absolutely not recording, but Rosie didn’t care what he thought. They were simply there to get the rest of her stuff – a task she’d been hiding from for far too long. Among her things, there were personal items belonging to her late sort-of fiancé James. Those things needed a new home now too.
‘What in the world...?’ Cassius held up his hand like he was avoiding the paparazzi.
‘Which is pretty much what I said about your sexbot Zoe.’ Rosie laughed, because she was past caring what her extremely ex-ex got up to. ‘Don’t worry, just grabbing what’s mine. We won’t ruin your love-in.’ She could just imagine him cosying up with his synthetic girlfriend collection, showing them his boring tech magazines and pretending to feed them prawn crackers.
‘There’s no love-in, Rosie.’ He reached over and batted away Flick’s camera phone. ‘Actually, I’ve missed you. I made a huge mistake with Zoe. She’s no fun at all and I can’t have an intelligent conversation with her.’
‘Save the sob story,’ said Flick, giving Rosie a gentle shove so that they both tumbled into the flat’s hallway.
Cassius’s eyes searched Rosie’s face. They were wide and sad, and in times gone by, she might have felt sorry for him and agreed to hear him out. But Rosie two-point-zero wasn’t giving him her time.
In fact, this swoop symbolised a great big, two-fingered salute to all of the past boyfriends who had less than measured up to what Rosie now knew she deserved. Dingo Dave and his collection of knicker-stuffed plush toys. That guy who’d been onCrimewatch. And of course, James, who she’d kept on a pedestal for far too long, even though she’d suspected for years that he’d been a two-timing dirtbag.
‘Serena, do me a favour,’ said Rosie, to Cassius’s voice-activated virtual helper. ‘Play Kelly Clarkson’s “Since U Been Gone”. I want to enjoy this.’
