Page 34 of Die for You
But I can’t bring myself to reject his offer either.
He pulls my hand free of my mug and holds it, thumb rubbing the center of my palm and making all of my nerve endings collect there before he drops it to sign,You’re brave. I’m proud of you.
I don’t know how to compute those words. The last time anyone told me they were proud of me was when my parents were still alive.
I pull my hand out of his grasp, feigning a cough. His touch is too intense. If I let him keep touching me, I won’t want him to ever stop. “More like stupid. He’ll freak out when they serve him. This whole thing will probably explode in my face.”
That’s why you have us. When I drop my gaze, Finn reaches across the table to tilt my chin up. My stomach somersaults. His gaze is intense, entrancing.You did the right thing. Nothing that happened to you is your fault.
My heart cleaves in two. He always knows exactly the words I need.
“Thank you,” I murmur. A beat of silence passes before I heave a sigh and push my mostly empty mug away. “Anyway. Can we leave now?”
He stands without another word, circling the table to help me up from my seat. But before I can accept the hand he holds out to me, his brows furrow and he drops down to one knee.
My heart drops with him.
What the?—
With both hands, Finn reaches for my shoe. For the laces that have come untied.
I suck in a breath.
The barista who was eyeing him up when we walked in stops by our table with a grin. “I thought there was about to be a proposal!” She giggles while Finn ties my laces. “Can I get you any dessert?”
“We’re good,” I blurt, standing as Finn helps me to my feet. “Thank you.”
“Have a great day!” the barista calls.
I bolt out the door and to Finn’s car, embarrassed that the same thought of a proposal crossed my mind. Thank god he’s notthatunhinged.
On the way back to my apartment, Finn and I fight over the radio. We battle between rap and pop, folk and country, sad ballads and upbeat anthems.
When my hand reaches for the dial to change the station again just to piss him off, he growls, “Aurora.”
I freeze, a delicious shiver rippling down my spine. Fuck, I want to hear him growl my name like that again.
Too soon, we pull up along the sidewalk in front of my apartment. My chest tightens. I’m not ready to go back inside that apartment. Not ready to be alone again.
“I know I shouldn’t thank you forstalkingme, but...” I start.Finn lifts a brow, and I can’t believe I’m actually about to admit this out loud to him, but I can’t stop myself now. “I’m glad you were there. I really didn’t want to be at that courthouse alone. I know I should be used to it by now; I’ve felt alone mywhole life. I thought by now the loneliness would go away, that I’d get used to it. But...it only seems to be getting worse.”
Immediately, I drop my gaze to my hands twisted together in my lap. I can’t believe I just admitted that to him. That I just said those words out loud. A feeling I’ve buried so deep down, I refused to acknowledge it even to myself. What the hell is wrong with me?
Finn taps my hand to get my attention, but I can’t bring myself to look at him.
“Aurora.” His voice is raspy from disuse, tinged with a hint of a plea.
I shouldn’t feel like a bolt of lightning is striking through me every time he says my name.
Finally, I drag my gaze up to his, where he’s watching me with a line between those dark brows. An intensity in his eyes that is somehow sympathetic without crossing into pity.
You don’t have to be alone anymore. Not for another day.
I clear my throat. “I need to get used to being alone. You live alone; you die alone. I just need to get over it.”
He shakes his head, adamant.No. It’s okay to not want to live your whole life alone. That doesn’t make you weak.
Now I have to blink away the tears. Damn him.
