Page 71 of Make Me Pretty
I step forward and kick his thigh hard enough to make him skid. He scrambles to keep his balance, nearly dropping the joint. “Why are you smoking, anyway? I didn’t know you did that,” I ask shortly. “More than the one time.”
“Because I can?” Abel replies just as fast, posing it as yet another question, like I’m some sort of fucking magic eight ball. My molars slam together, and my bag slips from my shoulder, dropping to the concrete with a dull thud. Just as I open my mouth to snap at him, the bell blares around us, sounding hollow and echoey.
The breath blown between my clenched teeth is hot and long. Fingers bite into my forearms as they cross over my chest, valiantly resisting the urge to choke the little brat. Now he’s made melate.
“Is that aproblemfor you, Mr. Goodie-Two-Shoes?”
“Fuck off. I just mean doesn’t getting high fall a little outside the realm ofcontrolling what you feel?”
“It’s better than the alternative.” he croaks on another inhale. The air feels thinner as I breathe in deeply.
My toe scrapes over dust and gravel, and the gray stains purple. “What alternative?”
A cloud wafts in my direction, making me wrinkle my nose. Abel clicks a lighter on and off. “What do you want, Peris?” The spark of the wheel. A little orange flame. It disappears. He sounds tired, and I don’t know why that makes my heart sink. It’s probably the weed and not because he didn’t sleep either.
“Why are you up here?”
My eyes roll up toward the pale blue sky. Of course, I’ve veered off track. Every time I see Abel and his stupid fucking face, I lose the plot. “Why’d you graffiti my parking spot?”
He rolls the spliff between his index finger and thumb, nearly burned to the end. “We were told to decorate them for the game.”
“Withspray paint?”
He shrugs and drags the cherry over the concrete, smearing a black stain. “I like to leave a mark.”
I stare at the dark streak, feeling the inconsequential mark far too deep inside me. “An illegal one.”
“Apparently.” He pushes to his feet and walks to the edge to flick the roach over. Sighing, he drags his fingers through his white hair before dipping down to grab his old, ratty backpack. He tries to walk right past me, and I should let him—I really should—but my arm darts out of its own volition, fingers wrapping around the tiny circumference of his bicep.
Abel’s head tilts down and to the side, staring blankly at our touch with bloodshot eyes. Even though layers of cotton, he’s so hot, he burns cold.
I flex my fingers, pressing deep enough that I know the spots will ache with my vacancy when I remove them. When our eyes finally connect, his expression doesn’t shift at all. I don’t know what I was expecting, but his complete and utter detachment was not it.
Confusion eddies, merging with the hot uprise of offense and something that stings.
“Why the fuck aren’t you reacting to me?” I don’t mean to say the thought aloud, but it doesn’t make sense.
Just last night, he was so vigorous and assertive, forcing his will upon me until I split into fractions. Mewling and panting and moaning with my touch, begging me to fill him up, and now… nothing but this bland apathy.
His deep breath in is more relative to a sigh, and that makes my nostrils flare, upper lip curling as he blinks slowly. “Maybe because there’s nothing for me to reactto.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean,” I demand, feeling hot and tight all over.
Abel pulls back, swiping his hand over his forehead before digging into his eyes. When he drops his arms, his bright red eyes stay on me, at least. “You’re asking way too many questions right now, Peri. It’s not that big of a deal.” His hand twirls in the air in front of him. “We’renot that big of a deal.”
My jaw falls slack at the utter absurdity of his words.Not a big deal? Is he shitting me right now?
“Everything about us has been a big deal sinceyoufucking made it that way,” I snap at his retreating form.
As his long, pink-stained fingers wrap around the silver handle, he glances over his shoulder. “It’s all in your head, baby.” And then, steel slams closed behind him, leaving me alone on a rooftop that aches like him.
CHAPTER 22
ABEL
Leaveit to Peris to find myonefucking hiding place.
We all need an escape, and he just keepstakingmine away.
