Page 111 of Rocky Mountain Home
Huh. “The kids can’t be very old. I don’t even know that it had registered they were expecting before I left.”
“A month and a half old, so yeah, you probably hadn’t even clued in.” Dare looked thoughtful. “They were really cute. Even more cute than Justin, but not quite as cute as Colt.”
Jesse laughed, running his palm in a circle in the hopes that he’d convince Buckaroo to make an appearance. “You’re rating my nieces and nephews?”
She twisted toward him, those expressive eyes catching hold and keeping him fixed upon her. “More like I’m working through my own thought processes. I really don’t know very much about kids, Jesse. I helped out a little when Sasha and Emma were small, but things were weird back at the beginning with Wendy, so I didn’t spend a lot of time around them when they were babies. I feel a lot more comfortable with kids once they’re toddlers.”
“You’re going to do great,” Jesse insisted, before reaching down and tangling his fingers with hers. He tugged them upward to his lips and kissed them gently. “Confession. I don’t know much about babies either. I figure we’ll make it up as we go along.”
“We’ll have to.” That crease returned between her brows. “Well, if everything’s okay.”
“Shhhh.” He kissed her fingers again and curled an arm around her. “Let’s look on the bright side here. You’ve been feeling good, and you look great. You haven’t had any more dizzy spells. Hopefully tomorrow morning the word is that you get to go home.”
Dare tipped her chin slowly. “You’re right.”
The next second Jesse was tugged into different directions. The idea of home—if she got the all clear tomorrow they’d be able to pack up their bags and head to Heart Falls. The trip had gone well enough they could return at any time for a visit. Jesse could see his family without it being a horrible, earth-shattering situation.
This was good. No, this was great.
Why did it feel like the pit of his stomach had just dropped a foot?
He shoved the thoughts away, focusing back on Dare. “I hope you got enough quiet time, because the next few minutes we’re bound to have another crowd of visitors.”
“I don’t mind. Everyone’s been pretty neat, and while I wouldn’t suggest bed rest as the best way to meet a family, in some ways it’s been good because, hey, they know where to find me.”
“Bonus points, because you can’t run away,” he teased. “You just kick the lot of them out of the room.”
“It’s okay that I was alone earlier,” she insisted, stroking her fingers over his jaw as she examined his face. “I spend a lot of time by myself at Silver Stone. This having-somebody-around-all-the-time is a little overwhelming. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate it, but I needed time to breathe.”
Words leapt to his tongue, and for an instant he considered tossing them away.
Something made him change his mind. Forced him to consider how much she’d dealt with over the past couple of days. She’d done it like a trooper too, and it was stupid to not share a personal secret when she’d been basically on display for his family.
Still, he spoke slowly, wondering if she’d get it. “It’s going to sound stupid, especially considering how many of us are always around, but there are times even in the middle of a Coleman gathering I feel as if I’m alone.”
Jesse stretched out and cradled his head on his arm. He expected she’d reiterate something along the lines of “being alone isn’t always a terrible thing”, but she didn’t say anything for a minute or so.
When she spoke, it was enough to smack him hard.
“Just because someone is physically there, it doesn’t mean they’re really there for you. Or that they see you. I think that might be worse than having them not around at all.” Her eyes had gone dark again, her face tight.
“Lonely in the middle of a crowd?” Jesse shook his head. “It sounds pathetic.”
“It sounds real,” she chastised him. She ran her fingers into his hair, damn near petting him into a submissive pile of relaxation despite the serious topic. “I even think you can be lonely with another person, if you’re not connected. If they’re not really there.”
He was one hundred percent sure she wasn’t talking about them. “Who made you lonely like that, Dare?” he asked quietly.
She hesitated then shrugged. “Maybe my memories are overly dramatic. I dated someone in high school. I thought we were closer than it turned out we really were.”
Jesse didn’t have a good feeling about this. “I hate the bastard already.”
Dare’s gaze followed her fingers as she continued to slowly caress his jaw absently. “He didn’t break up with me when the accident happened, if that’s what you’re wondering. It was our last year. Grade twelve, when you’re making all sorts of big plans. I really liked him, and I thought we had something special, but anytime I tried to get closer, he’d have some good reason to pull back. And everyone else seemed okay with casual, as if it was just the thing to do—have a steady girl or boyfriend to go to all the school events.”
Now this was starting to make sense. “So you were together physically, but not much more.”
She nodded. “Until he wasn’t even there physically.” She stopped her daydreaming to look him in the eye. “A couple days after graduation he sent me an email saying he’d gotten the job in Calgary that he’d applied for, so wish him well and—that was it.”
Jesse popped up on his elbow. “That was it, what?”
