Page 72 of The Cowgirl's Secret Love
Karen looked shocked. “I’m very competent at what I do.”
“Damn right you are,” Finn agreed. “I think you tell yourself that sometimes. But after observing for the past month, I’ve noticed you don’t always let other people say the same thing. And it’s not modesty but denial.”
Her mouth opened then closed as she considered. She stroked his arm, absently caressing him as if the touch helped center her. “So, my endgame is to admit I’m awesome?”
“That’s a good goal. But let’s talk for a minute. I use that question about endgame when I face a situation where my temper’s taking off. It works even better if I think ahead of time about what I’m working toward. You said you’re stuck in a cloud of darkness. I know you want to get rid of it. Aiming at a target makes it easier to step away from negative emotional distractions. It’s one of the first lessons our mentor taught me and Zach.”
Karen paused and glanced into the sky for a moment before speaking firmly. “I’m going away to school in the fall. Right now, I’m here in Heart Falls, spending time with my sisters and helping you guys get the dude ranch going.” She took a shaky breath. “I’m spending time with friends and going for horseback rides, which means I have zero reason to complain about anything because all of those things are fantastic.”
How the hell to make this clear? “Those aren’t goals, that’s a laundry list of what you’re doing. What do youwant? When you look deep inside yourself, what do you see yourself doing five years from now? Or if that’s too far off, think about a month from now or tomorrow. What are you doing to put a smile on your face? I don’t mean a shits-and-giggles smile like life is a constant party. Work isn’t always fun, but even when Zach and I are dealing with the knottiest problem, there’s a satisfaction to getting it done if it’s a step toward the real goal I want to achieve.”
“I can’t declare my long-term goals that easily,” Karen complained, pushing away from him slightly. “I mean, I have to analyze what I’ve done in the past, then—”
“Screw being systematic, go with your gut,” Finn ordered. “Close your eyes.”
She gave him a dirty look but followed his instructions.
Her slightly damp lashes rested against her cheeks. A crease lay between her brows, and tension gripped her body.
Finn wanted to fix it all.
He gently caressed her cheek. “Take a deep breath then picture yourself waking up tomorrow morning. What’s the first thing you think of that would make you happy, deep down in your gut? What are you looking forward to?”
“Dandelion Fluff jumping on me.”
The words shot out of her as if jet-propelled. Her eyes popped open. The expression of shock that followed made Finn’s lips twitch into a smile.
“Why don’t you have him anymore?” Finn asked gently.
“Because animals don’t belong in the house,” she said automatically.
“Some don’t,” he agreed. “Some do. Why can’t Dandy be yourin the house to cuddle withpet?”
Her lower lip trembled. “I’m going away to school in the fall,” she repeated. “I can’t take a kitten to college.”
“Maybe not, but that’s a problem for down the road. If you want, we can go out and grab the furry beast tonight. I’m sure he’d love to jump on you first thing in the morning.”
Damn. The expression in her eyes was tearing him apart. As if she couldn’t believe she was allowed the simple pleasure of a cat in her house.
He pushed his luck. “What else do you want when you wake up tomorrow? Don’t think about if it’s on your current to-do list, because you didn’t make that list when you were thinking about yourself.”
Her gaze dropped to his lips. “I want to be in your arms.”
Hell yeah.
She straightened slightly, hand rising to cup his face. “I want to wake up in the morning in bed with you, but even as I say that, I know it’s a crazy idea considering you’re still hip deep in a cast, and there’s—”
“Yes.” His fingers tightened on her chin. “The thing you want. I’m saying yes to that. Screw the excuses that instantly popped to mind saying you can’t have it, or you shouldn’t have it, or you need to do something before you get to have it. That’s the stuff you need to sayfuck itto.”
“But—” She slammed her lips together. Breathed in slow and deep then tried again. “What I want is you, Finn. Period. It’s what I’ve wanted since forever. I’ve done a shitty job showing that. I don’t know what I’m doing going forward, but if this isteach Karen new tricksnight, I will absolutely say that when I picture tomorrow morning and the morning after that, what would make me smile is to have you beside me. And Dandy.”
Finn had zero problem ranking up there with a handful of fur, especially considering exactly how big a change it was for her to admit that particular desire.
“Then you’ve got me. I’ll worry about how to deal with my damn broken leg. Now wiggle up here a little more and give me your lips because someone just set an outstandingly clear goal. She needs a reward.”
Karen pushed up on the arms of his chair, still trying her best to keep her weight off him. But when she tilted her head and leaned in close, it was all warm breath and sweet offering, no holding back. Their lips pressed together slowly. Softly. Tentatively, not because they weren’t certain they should be doing this but because it was a moment to savour.
Finn threaded his fingers into the hair at the back of her head and cradled her close. Tasting and teasing, slowly bringing up the heat until she squirmed so hard he caught hold of her hips.
