Page 116 of Losing My Siren Luna
She is my first priority, above anything else. I’m not here to cater to his feelings, only hers. I’ve been too distracted with nonsense since coming here. I feel like I failed her right now.
When I go back to her room, Mimi is cradling Ela’s head in her lap as Ela sobs uncontrollably. That alpha just left her here like this?
I set the tray down on the nearest flat surface and ran to her other side, sliding in bed beside her and pulling her to my chest. She struggles to cling to her elderly chambermaid, who has become more like her nanny. Mimi is like Ela’s mother here in the pack, which I am eternally grateful for. Since the King’s ex-mate passed away, I doubt Ela has had a woman to be that for her.
Ela feels my magic as I let it seep into her from my fingertips, and then turns to cling to me instead.
“Don’t leave me,” she wails, the pain in her voice is haunting. “Please. Don’t,” hiccups and shattered breathing wrack her body as she buries her face in my chest. “Not them. Not them.”
“Them?” I combed my hand in the back of her head through her hair, letting my magic spread over her, trying to calm her so she could get her breathing under control. I looked up at Mimi with confusion. "Who isthem? Whatthemis she referring to?"
“She just keeps asking for the alpha and saying ‘not them’ over and over again. I don’t know,” Mimi shook her head, a worried look on her face. “I heard her from across the hall and rushed over.”
“Was the alpha not here when this started?” Did he upset her then leave her to cry like that on her own?
“No. I didn’t see him at all. I rushed over the moment I heard her too. She had an attack like this on her first day with us. The Delta told me to watch for it. She must have experienced something horrible in her last pack.”
Let Mimi’s words sink in. Maybe the alpha wasn’t responsible for this, though I’m still not happy he left her in the state she is in.
Them? Could it really have been the men from her previous pack that caused this reaction from her?
I hold her, rocking her back and forth until she is back to sleep. I don’t know what else to do for her right now. Her mind needs a break if this is from trauma and not heartache like I originally thought.
“If you are alright with her, Cedric, I’m going to go find the Alpha for her like she asked,” Mimi tells me. “She kept calling his name when I first came in here.”
I sighed deeply. “He’s busy at the moment,” I told her. He’s busy sulking and being a shitty mate to leave his wife here to suffer without him. In his current state, I doubt he will be able to keep his temper at bay enough to calm her down. He might make this worse. “Can you get the Delta to come be with her?” He has the same ability as me to help calm his Luna. I might need to make a quick visit to the sea.
“Not the Alpha? I’m sure he would want to be with her if he knew of her current state.”
You would think. I resist the urge to degrade the man to this woman, and instead just say, “He is the one who sent me. I’m sure he will come when he can.” When his temper is under control again.
“Okay,” Mimi murmured, giving Ela one last look of sympathy and pity. “The poor girl. I wish she would just talk to us. We are all here for her. I wish she would let us know how to help her get through this.”
I smiled tightly as Mimi turned to leave and get the Delta like I asked. If Ela is reliving trauma from her first life, it might not be that easy to talk about. She might not even know how to tell anyone she is in her second attempt at life. Her husband is under contract to not say anything, and I have been commanded by my king to not tell her more than needed.
I’m starting to feel like there is a need to tell her everything I know. For her sanity, if nothing else.
Her pain doesn’t feel like heartache at all as I start gauging her emotions. It feels like overwhelming anxiety and fear. Fear of what, I don’t know. I’m starting to get an idea, but I need her to be able to tell me about it to be sure.
My king told me very little when he sent me here. I don’t think he even knew much of Ela’s previous life, just what he learned from the alpha and the people in this pack helping to fight to bring back their true luna. He didn’t want to leave his daughter here after learning how poorly the alpha once treated her, but without her magic he couldn’t bring her to the sea with him. The contract with the alpha, and his changed behavior, gave him reason to believe she would be safe here this time around. He claimed it was not safe for the world to know too much about her and her relationship with him, and to let her rebuild a new life and a second chance with her mate if that was what she desired. If she didn’t want her mate even in this life, I was told to take her to an allied Fae village hidden in the East of here until her magic came, then she would join us in her father’s kingdom to live as the princess who would one day inherit his kingdom as his sole heir.
I’m supposed to keep my limited knowledge of her first life a secret, but I wonder if that is truly the right choice right now.
She is hurting. This isn’t the pain of jealousy or heartbreak. This is something more…
This is the reaction of a person who has experienced horrific trauma, and I need to talk to her about her first life to know what caused it.
I need her father’s permission to tell her everything I know in hopes she will be able to open up to me about what she went through.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
“Everything okay?” Cherum pokes his head in. “I thought the Alpha was with her? Did she wake up?”
“She did,” I almost growled, “She had a panic attack, it seems. Your Alpha doesn’t believe he will be of any help to her.”
“That idiot,” Cherum groans, running a hand down his face. “Did he cause it again this time or was it something else?”
Again? A new bout of anger fills me hearing that. “She was asking for him, so I doubt it, but I still would prefer for you to be the one to stay with her until I get back.”
