Page 14 of Losing My Siren Luna
When I first felt the bond right before she rejected me, it was like gravity was pulling me towards her, but I soon went crashing back to earth as the rejection left her perfect lips. The pain in my heart was so great, and Killian was tearing me apart on the inside, blaming me for his loss of her.
His growling turns into whimpers at the memory.
“Hell, I thought she was glaring at you. I guess she was just overcome by the bond too and was trying to hold herself back. It looked like she hated you. Imagine being used as a pawn by your own family but the marriage turned out to be with your mate. She must feel so relieved.”
I flinched at his words. “She hates me,” I mumbled.
“Hates you?” Nilo questions. “Why would she hate you? Because of the rumors about you? Well….I guess you do spend a lot of time at the brothels. It's widely known that you’re the cold-hearted warmonger who likes to keep his bed warm with women. This is going to break several ladies’ hearts. They were expecting you back tonight on your own word that this was just a marriage on paper.”
“Shit, will you stop,” I groaned. He doesn’t know when to shut up. “I’m never stepping into a brothel again. There will never be any other woman but Lira again, okay? So don’t say anything to anyone to suggest otherwise.”
He holds his hands up defensively. “Hey, I get it. You should tell this to Cherum and Meldec as well as the rest of the commanders. You told them all not to regard Wayne’s niece as Luna, since she would be gone after two years. You even told the servants in the packhouse to address her only as Lady Elelira and not Luna. You told them not to regard her with favor since she was only here temporarily.”
He’s right. I remember once saying all those awful things. I need to fix this situation now.
“Tell the staff she is their Luna, and to treat her as such. Now. I will not tolerate any disrespect towards her. None. I want her to feel welcomed and treated like a princess.” That’s what she is. She just doesn’t know it. I will never treat her as anything less.
“What about her room? You had her placed in the tower furthest from your room. Do you want me to tell the staff to move her?”
I was hoping we would share my room from this day forward, but with the way things turned out, that isn’t possible. I couldn’t even dance with her, knowing how uncomfortable that would make her feel.
The first reception we had, Nilo teased me after his speech by calling us to share our first dance. I stopped him before he could do the same this time. After that slap, I don’t want to be on the receiving end of her anger again. I won’t touch her again until she is ready for it. She doesn’t trust me now, and I won’t earn her trust by going against her wishes.
The room I had her put in was the least desired room in the castle. Less so than even the servant's quarters. It is drafty, making it humid and hot in the summer and freezing in the winter. Even the fireplace does little to fully warm the room.
“Change her room. Move her down to my hall, as close to me as possible. Have Niomi start tonight.”
“You got it, Alpha. Anything else?”
I look towards the reception hall and the people there celebrating our wedding. Killian is urging me to return and check on our mate, worried about how she is being treated in our absence. With the way I spoke to my men in the past about Elelira, I don’t think any of them would be looking out for her, or making sure she was treated well. I can’t even remember how she was treated at our reception the first time around.
I had sat with her out of obligation, but spent all my time ignoring her until Nilo’s speech and that blasted dance. Once that was over, I excused myself, then retreated to my bedroom to rest before my night in town. I didn’t check on her once, though I do remember dreaming about her during that nap, which frustrated me to no end.
What did she do after I had left, I wonder? I avoided her like the plague, and didn’t have a proper conversation with her once. Besides Niomi, who was the most disposable omega in the castle, which was why I originally assigned her to Lira, I don’t think she was close to anyone else.
Niomi had passed away before Elelira rejected me. I asked the other omegas about her and how she passed her time, but no one knew. They didn’t even know who was helping to manage her room or look after her.
A stableboy recalled seeing Elelira wandering into the forest, up the stream about once a week. Was she meeting someone then? A friend? I never found out.
She was completely alone in the pack, it seemed, which is why she had no qualms about rejecting the pack and her position as Luna. The anguish the pack felt as she severed her ties to everyone was my fault. I treated her like an enemy, so they did too. Many of the staff and warriors grieved for a long time about their treatment of their true Luna. Their regret and guilt deepened mine.
I won’t have my pack members have those same regrets.
“It’s her birthday,” I told my Beta.
His eyes grew big. “You’re right! I had forgotten that was the arrangement made by Wayne. He had to wait until today so she would no longer be a minor.” He then made a face at me. “You cradle robbing tramp. She’s -”
“It’s not that much of an age difference. Seven years is a common age gap,” I growl.
“If you say so,” he shrugs, still looking disgusted.
I’ve been alpha since I was 18, thanks to my father and then mother dying in the war. I then spent the next 7 years in constant battle and war with the North. I may look much older than her, but her radiant beauty would be hard for anyone to match. I look a lot less used and worn out than I did before coming back. The time I spent searching for Elelira and then meeting all her father’s terms to bring her back weathered my appearance greatly.
“So, what do you want to do about her birthday? Do you want me to send out for a gift? I can tell the staff to embellish her new room with flowers and have gifts delivered by the time you both retire to your rooms.”
“Do it,” I ordered, not knowing what else to do for her.
“You could start with wishing her a happy birthday,” Killian mutters, “And apologizing for the kiss. If she is comparing the current you to you of before, give her a reason not to. Start with not abandoning her at our wedding reception.”
