Page 64 of Losing My Siren Luna
After King Brennus left, in a manner that was way angrier than when he came, if that is even possible, I was left in a state of dread and confusion.
That necklace. I forgot about the damn thing after giving it to her last night. The more I think about it, the more I can’t help but recall Lira the night she rejected me. I was overwhelmed by her ethereal beauty in her thin silk slip of a dress, and then by her rejection. The sight of her when she said those words, rejecting me with so much fortitude, like she couldn’t wait to leave me after the years of being trapped in our rough marriage, it’s an image I will never forget.
I tremble in anguish as the feelings associated with that night come forth with the image of her, all the heartache and regret like a ton of bricks compressing on my chest. Killian is lamenting in my head, that image bringing nothing but heartache and loathsome thoughts towards me from him.
I messed up so much in our first attempt at life. Immensely. I keep messing up in this second chance too, and I’m going to lose her all over again if I don’t get it together.
That image of her in my head; I recall her wearing one more thing besides the thin dress she discarded before escaping to the sea.
She was wearing a necklace.
I hadn’t seen it before, and didn’t pay close attention to a piece of jewelry when my world was falling apart, but I can faintly remember its presence and basic shape against her slim, beautiful throat.
“Do you think it was the same necklace that her father had you give her last evening?”Killian asks me.
“Maybe, but how would she have had it back then, but her father had it in this life?”
Killian thought for several moments. “Maybe you can ask Niomi if she has a piece of jewelry that she brought from her uncle’s pack that looks similar to the one from her father?”
“What if she got it here?”I asked, thinking someone here may have given it to her. “We paid very little attention to her.”
“That’s not true,”Killian growls, “You avoided her because of how much attention you would pay her when she was around.”
That’s very true. She occupied most of my thoughts before, as she does now. I was ignorant before, though. I thought it was a trick by her uncle. I should have realized sooner that I was drawn to her because she was my mate, not because of a trick conjured up by her uncle. I even thought that was why she kept seeking me out when she first got here. I thought that seeing her was part of whatever spell her uncle cast on me. I didn't see any other reason for Lira to keep seeking out a husband who was acting as if he clearly wanted nothing to do with her.
I’m such an idiot. I could have been happy with her from the start. I could have showered her with affection and love. Deep down, that’s what I wanted to do. I overthought her uncle’s part in our marriage. She was an adult. I never even considered she could be a siren or a hybrid. I was told she was a pure Lycan.
“It’s because your life demanded for you to stay cautious and guarded, always on the defense,”Killian grumbles at me, reading my thoughts, “I did tell you many times, though, to be kind to her.”
“I know,”I sighed, “I should have listened to you.”
“Start listening to me now,”Killian warns me, “I want my mate.”
“I want my mate too.”More than anything, I just want to love Lira.
The silk gown she left behind when she rejected me was my treasure up until the day I came back in life to our wedding day. I would hold it every night, her lingering scent still clinging to the fabric the only thing that would calm me enough for me to get to sleep.
My sleep would always be short, nightmares of Lira fading into the distant ocean water jolting me awake every night. Then there were the betrayal pains. That lasted just a short time until I felt her death, but there was no sleeping through that.
How Lira managed during our marriage, I will never know. That just proved her strength. It proved how much stronger she always was than me. I never want to feel those pains again.
Anxiety starts to eat at me as that leads me back to the disturbing thought of King Brennus sending one of his warriors to watch over Lira.
What if he falls for her, and she falls for him in return? I would be helpless to stop it.
She’s breathtaking and perfect in every way. It wouldn’t take much for him to fall in love with her, especially if she is still resolved to reject me. Cherum and the Luna’s guard, all her maids, Niomi, and even a brothel woman I used to visit all love her already. She is that magnificent. He would be a fool not to fall to her feet in worship just like I wish to do.
“Don’t be an ass anymore and give her a reason to fall into another man’s arms,”Killian growls at me. “Better yet, just give me control from now on. I can do the feet worshiping. I don’t trust you.”
“Hey, I still have a pack to run. Lira may like you, but the rest of the pack is terrified of you.”
“Are not,”Killian huffs.
“Are too, you giant ape. The only time the pack sees you is in battle or when you get pissed and take control away from me like you did earlier.”
“Fine,”he snarls, “But I’m taking control if I sense you about to be an ass to our mate again. You almost hurt her. That was all you, not me.”
I recoil at the reminder. Damn it, Lira might fall into the siren warrior’s arms the moment she meets him just to get away from me. I couldn’t do anything if she did.
