Page 78 of Losing My Siren Luna
Maybe that is why he didn’t write me off right then, thinking I was nothing more than my uncle’s pawn. Because I wasn’t eager for this. Then, with the reception, my indifference and disappearance may have intrigued him enough to find out why I had left, and then last night, our Lycans meeting for the first time. Maybe, just maybe, his Lycan felt a bit of the fated mate bond that connects us.
If Killian is longing for Val like Val is longing for him, then I can not separate the two of them. Not yet, anyway. Not unless Lachlan gives me a reason to.
“He won’t,”Val tries to reassure me, and I want to believe her, but my first life is still fresh in my mind. “He’s different. You saw him.”
“I saw him, alright. He is a perpetual playboy, remember. That was suave and made my heart flutter, as I’m sure it did many other women in the past.”
Val snorts, “I’m sure he didn’t have to work that hard to flatter the women he was PAYING to have relations with him. The money was all the flattery they needed.”
“That’s why that woman of the night was calling him by a nickname and not Alpha,”I reminded her, “Because it was simply money and acts they were exchanging.”
“Quit being a sourpuss. My goodness. We are getting a second chance, and maybe we are meant to use it to be happy with our mate this time,”Val nags me.
“Maybe,”I mutter, but still don’t want to cling to the hope flaring in my chest.
Lachlan showed me around the castle, and instead of showing me the regular grounds, he surprised me by showing me a plot that overlooked the sea that he said he was planning on building a family suite for us on; somewhere new to begin our marriage and life together the right way.
At the term ‘family’, Val became giddy like a schoolgirl inside me. My face and neck heated at the thought of what ‘family’ was insinuating, but I still refused to hope for that kind of future for us. I can't even imagine him and I being intimate with one another. I know I said I was willing to keep Mimi with me, but now that I know Lachlan won't force me, I don't know if I could force myself.
When we came to the cliff’s edge, I looked out towards the sea. Longing and hope then crept into my heart, and I let it. Hope that my father was out there and he was watching over me, caring for me from afar. My fingers linger over the necklace from him. He sent this to protect me. He must care for me. Cedric said as much, didn’t he?
And where is Cedric? I hope Lachlan’s Gamma is being nice to him.
Lachlan’s face became panicked, watching me staring vacantly at the sea, as I was no longer listening to his plans for the addition to the castle. He broke my thoughts, urging me back towards the regular castle grounds. He tried to cover his frenzied state by talking endlessly about Beta Nilo, telling me about a mission he was currently on, carrying the news of our marriage throughout the territory. I thought that was something that had already been done, and I coudn't focus much on the specifics of his conversation.
I tried to listen intently, but the close proximity we were walking in made the mate bond buzz with need inside me. It wasn’t like this yesterday. I almost wish I could go back to being cold and indifferent, putting my walls back up, no matter how much it might annoy Val, because when I was clinging to the numbness that brought, the mate bond was easier to ignore.
My skin is itching with the need to touch him, but I won’t give in. I can’t. The thought of touching him in the way the bond is urging me to, the intimacy that would involve, makes goosebumps break across my skin. My heart pounds in my ears, making fully comprehending anything Lachlan is saying almost impossible.
I almost wilted with relief when I saw Cherum in the great hall where dinner was to be served until the dining hall could be repaired. Lachlan didn’t miss the way I hurried to Cherum, gripping one of his arms with both hands like it was a lifeline. I had to hurry and tell him that I was just exhausted from walking around so much today, which was followed by Lachlan asking forgiveness repeatedly for not noticing.
Cherum’s warm hand placed on my back was like a balm that soothed my anxieties away. It did little to calm the mate bond, though. For that, I truly believe that touching Lachlan may be the only way to sate the bond’s need for him. Maybe not fully sate it with his still unclaimed and being so close to me for so long, but it would calm the itch that was nagging at me.
As dinner began to be served, I sat beside Lachlan, hoping he couldn’t hear my heart race when he pushed my chair in for me. The bond was fully awake and urged me to just reach out for him. Val was not helping the matter, begging for much the same.
When he took the chair beside me, I reached out and gripped his sleeve, unable to deny the bond or my Lycan any longer. He looked surprised for a moment, but smiled brilliantly before taking my hand, kissing my palm, then placing our interlocked fingers in his lap.
The bond instantly calmed with that, though my Lycan was anything but calm. She was leaping for joy inside my head. The sparks and electric waves traveling through my hand from his touch made her buzz with excitement.
Lachlan’s tender action, and I’m sure my blushing features, didn’t go unnoticed by those at our table or anyone in the room, for that matter. Cherum, who had just moments ago worried about the reasons for my relief at seeing him when we first came to the great hall, looked relieved himself that Lachlan really wasn’t the cause of my minor distress. He was the cause, but not for the reasons he was most likely thinking. The people around us looked relieved as well, probably having felt anxious to see us together after the scene we caused this morning.
Lachlan looked happier than I had ever seen him before. He kept smiling over at me, rubbing his thumb on the back of my hand, using his other hand to rub my arm, scooting his chair closer to me so he would have better reach.
That was how Cedric and Meldec found us when they finally joined us to eat.
Cedric frowned at the way Lachlan was holding my hand and massaging my arm. Gamma Meldec looked confused, but I don’t think it was because of us. He was frowning and furrowing his brows every time he looked at Cedric, which was often. I guess the Gamma is wary of fae races, just like most people in this pack. That's too bad. It doesn't make me want to let them know I'm half siren too, any more than before.
The meal was pleasant enough. Cherum informed me that Yasmin would need some time to adjust, seeing as Percy wanted to make her his chosen mate right away. I thought Lachlan might be displeased to hear one of his old flings was now permanently closed for business. He seemed happy for them though, and that just had Val reiterating that she really didn’t believe that this was the same Lachlan from before.
Too much had changed in this life from my first one, and I so wanted to believe her. The evidence for her statement was irrefutable, but I still have a hard time accepting it. I don’t know why.
Chapter 26
Lachlan and his men, including Cherum, had to hold some meeting on Nilo’s return to the castle, so Cedric eagerly volunteered to go for an after-dinner walk with me. Maurice and Thomas followed at a distance to keep me safe.
Lachlan tried to refuse Cedric on my behalf, thinking I was still tired, but I reassured him that I was fine, feeling better after eating. I wanted to talk with Cedric alone. I had so many questions about my father.
“You and the Alpha seemed to be on much friendlier terms,” Cedric tells me, sounding almost amused as we walked alongside one another along the docks.
