Page 78 of Country Music Cowboy
“I miss Brock.” Emmy Lou smiled. “My husband.”
Travis laughed, running his fingers through his hair. Loretta was laughing too. For a split second, the tension between them melted. Her smile was genuine, fleeting—but sweet. A series of those smiles, tangled in his sheets or held close against him, played rapid-fire through his brain. He wanted that back. Wanted that smile back in his arms where it belonged.
Chapter 14
Ten days. Ten days of dodging and hiding and fighting the urge to track him down and make him love her. Ten days of reminding herself that she was doing the right thing.
The tour convoy consisted of three tour buses and one equipment bus. And while the record label had retrofitted the LoveJoy bus, inside and out, she had a hard time sleeping there. After spending most of her waking hours with the Kings and Jace, the quiet of her bus was…deafening. Without something to distract her, her mind invariably returned to Travis. She knew she was being cowardly. She knew she should face him and offer up some sort of explanation, but she couldn’t.
If she tried to look him in the eye, she’d cave. It terrified her.
Once they arrived in Salt Lake City and found their hotel, Loretta headed straight to her room. She wasn’t sure what was worse, being on the road with no chance of anyone joining her or being in an executive suite knowing Travis could be her neighbor.
It doesn’t matter.She stood aside for the bellhop to bring in her bag and smiled her thanks. It didn’t matter that she saw Travis and Emmy Lou—or that he saw her.
She pushed her door closed, turned the extra lock, and rested her forehead against the cool surface.
Way not to overreact.
Apparently, that was the only reaction she had to Travis. Over-the-top. Highly in tune. Performing with him had been the sweetest sort of torture. If she’d thought she’d craved him before, there was no comparing that to what she was feeling now.
What you can’t feel.
She unpacked her bag, inventoried her minibar and fridge, scrolled through every channel on her television, and ran herself a steaming bubble bath before she gave up and called Margot.
“Lori-girl?” Margot yawned.
“Did I wake you?” She rested her head on the edge of the tub, the fizz of bubbles echoing in the mostly white marble bathroom. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” There was a smile in her voice. “You okay? You sound…strung tight.”
“I am.” She closed her eyes. “Margot…I made a huge mistake.”
“Hold on, I’m turning on my bedside lamp.” There was some rustling. “Okay, fire away. Just tell me you didn’t accidentally kill someone and you’re not pregnant.”
“Those are the two things that immediately come to mind?” Loretta shook her head, pushing little icebergs of bubbles away. “And in that order?”
“In my book, those are huge mistakes. Stop stalling and tell me what huge mistake you made.”
“I slept with Travis.” She blew out a slow breath, her lungs aching.
“Well, I figured as much, Lori-girl. It was pretty clear to everyone on the back porch that the two of you were on the way there.” Margot paused. “And?”
“And?” She groaned. “That’s it. That’s the mistake.”
“That’sit?” Margot waited.
“No…” It hurt to draw in breath. “I…I let him in, Margot. And I don’t know how to…stop.”
“I’m assuming we’re talking about that thing you don’t like talking about. The ‘f’ word.Feelings.” Margot was on the verge of laughter. “And how does he feel about you?”
“It doesn’t matter, Margot.” She pushed at the bubbles, sending water over the edge and onto the floor. “It’s not that simple, and you know it.”
“No, I don’t know it.” Margot sighed. “Why isn’t it simple?”
She wanted to tell Margot everything. About CiCi. About being threatened… Even her suspicions about Sawyer. “Because I don’t do feelings.”
“Lori-girl.” Margot sighed again. “You need to take a good long look in the mirror and see why that is. I know your mother’s let you down. I know your father’s a shit. And, you know I loved him, but Johnny let you down too. Hell, even I’ve let you down getting sick when you needed me—”
