Page 90 of Country Music Cowboy
Jace slipped his arm around Krystal’s shoulders and pulled her against him. Loretta watched as Krystal’s head rested on Jace’s shoulders.
Loretta glanced at Travis. Travis was staring at the candy bar, the boyish smile gone.
“I know,” Krystal said from her place on the floor. “There’s the shark octopus thing on the science fiction channel on demand.”
“You want to watch a shark octopus movie?” Jace asked, chuckling.
“Me? No. But I promised Heather I’d watch it and I want to keep my cool sister status.”
“Heather is Jace’s little sister,” Emmy Lou said. “She’s at college. The sweetest thing ever.”
“We met at your wedding.” Loretta smiled and handed Krystal the remote. “Far be it from me from taking away your cool sister status.”
“Thank you,” Krystal said, flipping through the channels.
Loretta sat back against the padded headboard, a pile of candy in her lap. “This was really nice of you,” she said. “I know it’s just a crappy video but…”
“He’s your dad.” Travis almost sounded angry. “And he’s letting the media tear your character apart?”
Loretta couldn’t help but look his way again.
He looked perfect, as usual, but in a tired way. Almost as if he could rest his head against the edge of the mattress and he’d drift off to sleep… And she could run her fingers through those curls of his. She flexed her hand, pressing her fingers flat on top of the comforter.
His eyes narrowed, watching her hand.
“How’s your father?” She sounded weird. Probably because of the lump in her throat. “Is he nervous about the surgery?”
Travis shrugged. “He’s real good at keeping his feelings hidden.” He was staring at her. “Self-preservation, I guess.”
Loretta swallowed, acutely aware of just how closely he was watching her. “There’s nothing wrong with that. Especially if you’ve been burned. Why set yourself up for more of the same?”
His jaw muscle clenched. “Because he knows we love him. It’s safe to be vulnerable with the people you love.” Travis cleared his throat.
“But people throw that word around all the time. Aren’t some people…unlovable?” She knew the answer to that. She was one of those people. Loretta sat forward, twisting a long candy rope. “How do you know when it’s real?”
Travis went back to studying her. But this time it wasn’t a stare down; it was gentler than that. “Youknow. And once you know, you have to trust it.”
I want to.“Or not,” she countered. She knew, deep down in her bones, that she loved him. “People use love as this universal answer. It makes things better, makes you happy, makes you whole… But it can do the opposite. Nothing hurts worse or strips away your dignity or makes you believe a lie or leaves a hole you’d never realized you had before. Love sucks.”
That was when she realized the television had been paused and her and Travis’s conversation had become the center of attention.
“At least, in my experience, love sucks,” she tried to tease. Her gaze darted to Emmy Lou. “I’m sorry. You just got married. I’m so sorry.”
“I’m sorry, Loretta.” Emmy Lou took her hand. “It took Brock and me ages to find our way back to each other. And there was a lot of hurt along the way. But now? I don’t want to think about my life without him. I hope one day you’ll find someone who makes you feel that way. Until then, my heart hurts for you.”
Loretta swallowed hard, staring at the candy in her lap. “Let’s just chalk up my emotional outburst as a sleep-deprived rant and forget it ever happened.”
“Okay.” Krystal paused. “But I feel like I need to say this much. I get where you’re coming from. I do. And there are days when I look at Jace and I know it’s going to fall apart because, honestly, why would he stay withme? I’m rude and bossy and opinionated and I don’t admit when I’m wrong—”
“All things I love,” Jace interrupted. “Especially getting you to admit when you’re wrong.”
“Which isn’t very often.” Krystal shook her head. “But then he looks at me and it makes sense. I breathe easier when he’s around. He’s…gravity. I know that I’d rather go through hell with him than without.”
This was why she didn’t do feelings. It got awkward. How could you have a conversation based on something so insubstantial and subjective? To Emmy Lou and Krystal, love was good and purposeful.
“Shark octopus time,” Krystal squealed, pressing play.
Loretta fluffed up the pillows and stared at the absolute mess of a movie they were watching. Around the time the thing had walked onto land to go after the girl in the bikini, Loretta drifted off.
