Page 89 of Double Daddies
Cami knows me better than anyone ever has. We’ve developed a shorthand of sorts and she curls into me, seeming very Little at the moment. That happens a lot during stressful situations when she’s feeling vulnerable. “I don’t want you to think I’m horrible,” she admits in a Little girl voice.
“Honey…” I gentle my tone, brushing my hand down her cheek. “I could never think that.”
She ducks her head, pressing her cheek firmly into my chest once more. “He was two days before we got back together,” she mumbles, but the words are clear enough that I hear them.
Ah. And we’d celebrated getting back together the same way any healthy couple would.
“I’m going to be a good dad,” I tell her, hoping the words will ease any bad feelings she’s holding on to until I can figure out how to make her let them go.
“I know.” She looks at me again, and there’s something at least approaching happiness back in her eyes. “Of course you will be. You’re already a great Daddy.”
Cami
It’s been a long day and when Ben suggests it’s time for bed, I’m quick to agree. I can feel his eyes on me as I undress, and by the time I’ve stripped, he has my pajamas ready.
“Come here,” he beckons with a crook of his finger.
Yawning, I make my way to him. Just seeing the ultra-soft, plush top in his hand makes me exhausted.
“Is this how it’s going to be?” Ben chuckles as he pulls the top over my head. It falls to just above my knees. “You’re going to sleep the day away?”
“It’s nighttime,” I point out, but I know very well what he means. It’s hardly eight o’clock, and I’m about to fall over.
“That’s okay.” He reaches over and tugs the covers back.
The light-blue bedspread is sprinkled with pink and purple flowers and is reminiscent of the comforter that used to decorate my bed when I was a little girl. I climb atop the bed and let Ben tuck me in. I gaze up at him, smiling softly at the familiar act. For just one second, I allow myself to pretend this is normal, that everything is always going to be just like this.
“I love you, you know that, right?”
I smile. “Of course I do.”
“No matter what?”
My eyes rove over his familiar, handsome face and I let myself be comforted by the adoration I see shining from the depths of his eyes, the color now more blue than gray. He leans down and kisses me, his lips briefly grazing across my own, and I let myself believe that it will be enough.
Until he slips out of the room and closes the door behind him. Then all the thoughts I’ve been doing my best to keep at bay bombard me.
He said he’s okay. Is he really okay? Of course not, what kind of question is that? How can he be? He’s just being nice because Ben is nothing if not nice.
Ugh, how am I ever going to be able to sleep like this? It’s enough to make a girl want to suffocate under a pillow… not enough to die, just enough to pass out and let this be tomorrow’s problem.
None of how icky I’m feeling is Ben’s fault. It’s not even mine, as much as my emotions are making me feel like it is.
Whose fault is it, then?
Ryle’s…
Just thinking of his name summons an image of him in my mind. He’s the perfect foil to light-haired, bright-eyed, fair-complected Ben. In fact, if they were super heroes, Ben would be Captain America and Ryle would be Batman.
Normally, thinking about nerd stuff like super heroes or DC verses Marvel makes me fall asleep, but tonight I’m wide awake. And picturing Ryle as Batman.
My tummy is in knots, hurting like the worst stomachache ever… and not just because the baby growing inside me may not be my long-term boyfriend’s. It’s because I lied. I let him believe Ryle was just some guy I bumped into, a man who happened to be in the right place when I was most vulnerable.
Ben is beating himself up over asking me for a break… I know him too well to think otherwise. And I’m trying hard to make Ryle into the villain, but I know better: this is all my fault. Because truth be told, I’ve always had a crush on rich, powerful, Ryle with the smoldering eyes.
Just thinking of those eyes, seeing them in my mind, makes my tummy lurch and my pussy pulse. Naughty pussy. It shouldn’t pulse, or get wet, or doanythingfor anyone other than Ben.
Except it does. Ithas. I know all too well. I squeeze my eyes shut, hoping sleep will kidnap me to slumberland, but all closing my eyes does is give center stage to my haunting, sexy memories.
