Page 47 of Starting Over with You
I haven’t told Sadie or Missy that, but maybe I should have because it would have saved me the embarrassment that crashed into me when Kenni looked up at me through her lashes after Missy said what she did. I saw the disappointment in Kenni’s eyes. It felt like my antics reminded her of that bastard she was married to, and the look she pinned me with hit me square in the gut.
I hate that man for allowing her to know what that kind of pain feels like.
If she had married me, she’d know nothing but love.
Wow. That’s a truth I wasn’t ready for.
I run my hands down my face and try to focus on the ice. I always come to Skyye’s private skate the day after she goes back to her mom’s. I don’t know if it’s guilt or what, but it’s almost as if I need to see her to know we’re okay. I miss the kid a lot when she’s not with me. I feel like sometimes I rely on her too much to fill the loneliness in my soul, and that’s not fair. I can’t end up like Liam, or Skyye will kick me in the balls.
I smile to myself. Skyye will be a force to be reckoned with.
Just like her mom and her aunts.
Our week was full of laughs and love. We went on trail walks. She skated and worked while I helped Matt build a playhouse for my nieces and nephew. I worked on Thursday and Friday, so Skyye stayed with Sadie. When I came home after my overnight for dinner and we sat down, I found myself wishing Kenni were there. Sadie’s kids were all talking about her. Apparently, she and Skyye had been stopping by Noelle’s every morning before going for a run. Or rather, Skyye ran while Kenni sunbathed—as Skyye told everyone with a smirk. When I brought up inviting Kenni to thenext family dinner, Sadie caught my eye and had me squirming under her intense gaze.
I never told Sadie how I felt about Kenni, but I’m sure she knew. Though, why she’s never said anything surprises me. Maybe she doesn’t actually know. Really, why does it matter? Do I need permission from my sister and baby mama to go after her? Wait, what am I thinking? That’s not even a possibility. Is it? That Kenni will be down to jump right into forever with me after she just went through hell with a cheating bastard?
I’m just over here feeling all my feelings…
I could sit here and say that we wouldn’t be compatible. That she and I would fizzle out, that years and years of wanting her wouldn’t matter once I had her. I know in my heart that’s not true. I want her. The reason I’ve never settled down is because I can’t see someone else in a place that Kenni belongs. Or maybe I’ve made it all up in my head and convinced myself that’s the reason why I haven’t had a relationship.
God, she makes me crazy.
Unable to help myself, I return my gaze to where Fable is talking with her hands and Kenni is listening intently, typing just as quickly as Fable’s hands move. Kenni looks fucking delectable in a little black pencil skirt that stretches over her backside and is tight along her thighs. She has on a fitted kelly-green tank that she covered with some kind of see-through long-sleeved thing to ward off the chill in the rink. She’s wearing killer black heels that show off her long, thick legs. Her hair is down in curls, framing her face, which is free of makeup, not that she ever wore much anyway. To top off the outfit, she has a pair of black glasses perched low on her nose.
Basically, I’m getting some naughty teacher vibes, and I want her to punish me with a ruler.
I groan inwardly as I cover my mouth with my hand, biting into my pinkie. You’d think I’d learn by now to control my need for Kenni, but that’s like controlling SI when they’re drinking. I’ve been lusting after her since the moment I realized she was thereason why my dick felt funny when she was around. I had never come in my pants before, but one swipe of Kenni’s tongue on mine, and I exploded. She makes me feel like that. Like I’m about to blow with just a simple touch or little tilt of her lips. I’m addicted to that feeling.
The feeling only she gives me.
Fuck me, but no one ever measured up to how she made me feel. I should just be honest with her, but I feel like a jackass doing that. I feel selfish for wanting to lock her down when she just found her freedom.
Because if I get the chance, Kenni will be mine.
But shit, she’s thriving being newly single.
I love watching her as a mom and an aunt. She is so attentive and always prepared. When she looks at Ash, Flint, and Skyye, and even Sadie’s kids, Rae, Tillie, and Mitchell, you can see her whole heart in her eyes.
Now, though, in business mode, she’s breathtaking. Just how she is as a mom, she’s attentive and giving Fable everything she wants. Fable is all grins, excited as she bounces on her toes, her blond hair swinging around her shoulders. Kenni even throws a thumbs-up to Skyye and cheers when she lands a skill.
Kenni has always loved with her whole body, and I wish I were on the receiving end of that love.
I exhale heavily as my stomach twists. I want her so badly, though I can’t help but wonder if she is even mine to have. I never made a move when we were younger. I was too intimidated by Sadie and Missy. I didn’t think they’d let me get close enough. Yeah, they suggested I kiss her, but they made it a point that it would be nothing but a kiss. They thought I wouldn’t want more, that she wouldn’t stay on my mind constantly, or that I would crave her.
Well, they were fucking wrong ’cause twentysomething years later, I’m still caught up on her.
It never felt like there was a moment when I could make my move. Would I have if I’d taken her back to Missy’s? Maybe. Butthen what? The unknown is a tricky fucking bitch, and I don’t care for it at all. I want to know that if I kiss her, she’ll want it just as badly as I do and she’ll be mine.
Just as I’m hers.
Hell, I sound like a fucking sap.
Skyye comes out of a turn, and she must have just noticed me, because she grins widely as she waves animatedly at me. My heart clenches in my chest, and a happy sigh leaves my lips as I wave back. Fable and Kenni look over at where Skyye is waving, and while Fable beams at me, Kenni looks unsure.
“Dean, hey! Come over here.”
I push off the wall that I was leaning on and head toward them. Kenni’s eyes track my movements, the curve of her cheeks filling with a rosy color that has my cock coming to life. When her eyes meet mine and she sees that I watched her check me out, she looks down at her computer, her whole face bright red.
