Page 38 of Great Falls Cadet
Now, Shade is quiet as he works, his healer’s hands sliding across my chilled muscles. It’s an effort of will to stop myself from sinking into Shade’s warm, callused palms. From nuzzling against his broad chest or velvety neck.
Shade’s long black hair is pulled back in a neat ponytail, his soft gray sweater covered beneath a starched white healer’s overcoat—the Academy’s red-and-gold crest stark against the fabric. Yes, the shifter is as stunning and clinically steady around my body as ever, but without a trace of the deep feeling I’m used to—the kind bedside manner a far cry from true affection. My stomach clenches. Some part of me has always known losing Shade would be the hardest. I just didn’t know it would leave me this hollow.
“—urine?”
I blink, realizing Shade had asked something. “Your pardon?”
“I asked whether you saw any blood in your urine when you used the chamber pot earlier,” Shade repeats.
My face blazes. “No.”
“Are you taking a tonic to avoid pregnancy?”
Oh, stars take me.I’m not, but my fae body hasn’t yet matured enough to start monthly bleeds. “Yes.”
“The tonics do not prevent the spread of sickness,” Shade tells me with a nonchalance of someone ensuring understanding of an arithmetic problem. “That is something to be conscious of if you take multiple partners.”
One more word and I swear my heated skin alone will set the infirmary on fire. I focus my thoughts on icy hail and frigid streams.
Shade puts a finger beneath my chin, forcing my face to his. “I expect an acknowledgment of understanding when I explain something important. If I cannot trust you to give me honest verbal answers, I will rely on a more thorough physical examination for the information I need.” His voice is kind despite his stern words. “That wasn’t a threat, just reality.”
I like you better as a wolf.“Understood,” I tell Shade quickly. “I’m aware bedding carries more risks than pregnancy and am careful. Is that acceptable?”
“And the tonic you lied about?”
I really like you better as a wolf.“I’ve not started bleeding. And yes, I am aware it is unusual. It is what it is. And… And no, I’m not bleeding now if you’re about to ask.”
Shade nods as if finding nothing odd about the conversation and thankfully stops talking. His clean earthy scent surrounds me, and I let my eyes close for one blissful moment, his hands inspecting an abrasion on my collarbone, pretending this is just another moment back in Lunos.
“I’ve no notion how you managed to return with only a few deep gashes and fatigue, but beside a whimperworthy muscle ache in the morning, you should be all right.” Shade’s voice is as warm as the crackling fire, but the professional distance in it stings more than the medicine he spreads.
I give him a tight smile. Mating with Coal had sped up the healing of my already quicker-to-heal body, though the crash from that boost is already on the horizon. My Shade would have known that. Would have yelled at Coal and me both for being reckless.
Moving to stand before me, Shade finds my gaze. “How are you feeling, cub?” he asks.
“I—” My heart stutters, the hope from that one word racing though my blood. I survey the male before me anew, taking in his wet hair and tired eyes. Shade’s wolf was gone for hours in a storm. Surely the male realizes his own absence, feels the fatigue of muscles from running across rough terrain. Might he now recall more than that? I force myself to breathe. “What did you call me?”
Shade’s eyes flicker up and left. “Cub, I think.” Shade smiles, the lines around his beautiful, full mouth—his white teeth flashing against tan skin—making me choke with longing. He’s the first male, human or fae, I ever slept with, and he will always be the one who makes me feel safest. He pats my arm like I’m a child with a scraped knee. I suppress a growl. “Because you look small and nippy. I will not do it again if it bothers you.”
“It’s fine.” I wait, waiting for him to say something more. To remember. To at least narrow his gaze in thought.
Shade does narrow his gaze. “You seem to be having trouble focusing, Leralynn. Did you strike your head?”
I swallow a curse. “No. Just recovering from an intense day.” I clear my throat, waiting while Shade palpates my head despite my assurance of its intactness. “Why is your hair wet, Shade?”
Shade blinks, reaching back to brush his hand over the glistening strands. His befuddled gaze skitters to the window before returning to me.”Same reason yours is, I imagine. It’s raining.”
“Your clothes are dry.”
“I changed,” Shade steps away, snatching up a bandage that’s gotten away from a basket of others. For a moment, the only movement in the room is that of Shade’s deft hands rolling the cloth. “I’m going to check in with Coal. River should be here shortly as well, then it is off to bed with you.”
“Not quite yet.” I pull the blanket tighter around myself. “I’m leaving the Academy.”
“So I’ve heard.” The utter lack of surprise or regret in Shade’s kind tone cinches my decision. He squeezes my shoulder. “But you should wait until morning to head out, for the sake of your horse if you won’t believe me about your own body.”
With that, Shade steps out through the side door separating his workspace from what seems to be a study. I glance over, catching sight of Coal leaning against the wall before the door closes.
“Is she all right?” Coal’s voice trickles through the walls. If I wasn’t so exhausted, I might feel guilty about eavesdropping on a conversation that the human they think I am would not have been able to hear—but as it happens, I feel nothing of the sort.
