Page 112 of Dangerous Men
I see the flicker of fear in his eyes, then. The panic that I might out him.
AndI love it.
“You’re not making any sense, babe,” he deflects, while confusion scatters through the group. “And you’re acting hysterical.”
I don’t bother responding. I just stare him down, the buried fury of the last decade finally breaking free through my eyes. It’s oh so satisfying when he breaks eye contact first.
How many times? How many times did I cover up the bruises he left on me before coming to one of Katie’s events? I lost track over the years.
But I’m done covering up the ways he’s hurt me.
“It’s not enough that you’re … entertaining so many men,” Katie says, trying to regain some control of the situation. “But dangerous men? Really, Sydney?”
“Just sayfucking,” I snap, exasperated. “We all know that’s what you’re implying. Why not justsay it?”
The group looks genuinely shocked.
“And it’s none of your business, any of you, who I might be fucking,” I add, shaking my head. “I could fuck my way throughthis whole city, and it still wouldn’t be any of your damn business.”
“Sydney!” Katie shrieks. “What is with this language? What’s happened to you?”
“Blow it out your ass,” I snap.
“See?” Chase motions toward me but speaks to the room like I’m not even here. “Do you see what she’s like now? How she’s been acting? It’s like she’s gone crazy!”
“You’ve been acting up since you and Chase had your little disagreement, and it’s time to put an end to it.” Katie manages to say the words, but she doesn’t sound so sure of herself now. There’s a waver in her voice, a hint of uncertainty in what this new, vulgar Sydney might do. How she might act.
“Dude, we get it, like, Chase made a mistake,” Lance admits, finally piping up from the couch. “But you guys belong together. You’ve always been such a perfect couple. Just put him out of his misery and take him back already.”
The words are so ridiculous, I honestly don’t understand them at first. It takes me a minute to rewind the dialogue in my head and comprehend the words he just said to me.
“You can’t be serious. Now you’re concerned? Where was this concern when he left me for his mistress? And you all were happy as can be to welcome her into the group?” I laugh. “Now you have an opinion on my life? What are you, my parents? Because they’re dead, and I want your opinion about as much as I’d like to dig them up and ask for theirs.” The words come out caustic as acid, and I’m almost shaking with the rage coursing through my body.
“Sydney.” Katie reaches for me, and I jerk away violently. “Chase is a good man. And he makes a decent living. When your shop closes?—”
“My shop isn’t going to close,” I insist. But no one is listening. They’ve never really listened to me, have they?
“—you’ll be grateful to have someone like him to take care of you. Not just emotionally, either,” she continues, as though I hadn’t interrupted at all. “But financially!”
Standing close to the couch, Chase just nods along.
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “No. That is not happening.”
“He made some mistakes, sure, but?—”
“He cheated on me,” I say, looking around at everyone. No one will look at me, now, their eyes glued to the floor, lips tight. “And not just once, almost the entire time we were together. Did any of you know about that before calling it a…mistake or a disagreement? Before you dragged me here?”
They did, I realize, when the silence goes on and on. When none of them will meet my eyes. They knew. The whole time.
And somehow that makes everything so, so much worse.
“Men make mistakes,” Lance says slowly. Like Chase scratched my car, not like he slammed his dick repeatedly into another woman. “And he really is sorry. Doesn’t that count for something?”
“I’m willing to move on from this, babe,” Chase says. “I’m willing to forget about this time apart. Forget the stuff you did with all those other guys, too.” He says this last part like he’s doing me a huge favor. Forgiving my crimes.
I’m stunned, rooted to the spot as he takes a step toward me, holding his arms open like we’re going to hug.
“You had your fun. But it’s over now. It’s time to come home. So, why don’t we?—”
