Page 40 of Chasing After You
“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you actually had feelings for her. You’ve been staring at her every chance you get,” Stacey says, turning off her phone to slide it into her pocket.Have I been staring at Mirabelle today?
Stacey’s in a surprisingly good mood today, giving me more leeway with her questions than usual, even without Mirabelle with her. “Make sure you get a good picture together,” she instructs. I must be hallucinating because I think she might be smiling at me? What the hell is going on today?
“Do you have enough for the interview?”
“Take the opportunity to flee while I’m offering it. I could always find more questions I’ve been meaning to ask.”
The dots connect in my brain, and I think I smile in Stacey’s direction for the first time ever. “Nope. I think I’ll get that picture with Mirabelle instead.”
“Maybe you do have a brain in that head of yours,” I hear her say as I walk away, but I couldn’t care less. Instinctively, I head in Mirabelle’s direction as she kneels down to chat with a child holding a speech tablet. It makes my heart flop funny when she beams at this child, and I wish I knew the right things to say to make her smile like that all the time.
My stepmom darts in front of me, forcing me to stop, and my stomach drops. I knew it was too good to be true I’d managed to avoid my parents so far. “Do you have a moment?” she asks, smiling at me.
Hearing what my dad thought of me the other day was awful, but I’m not sure I could stomach hearing how disappointed she is in me. She didn’t have to love me after falling for my dad, but she chose to, and finding out what she thinks of me might break me.
“Are you planning on yelling what a horrible person and predator you think I am for dating Mirabelle?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest.
She snorts, shaking her head as her smile grows. “Hell no. If you marry Mirabelle, it’d be my dream come true. I’ve been waiting for this to happen, but maybe don’t tell your father I said that.”
Excuse me, did she really just bring up marriage?Marriage?I know she doesn’t know this is a fake relationship, but even if it weren’t, it would be far too early to bring that up. I cough abruptly, choking on the breath caught in my throat. “Then, yeah. I have a moment,” I croak out, my voice rough as some of the tension seeps from my shoulders. It feels nice to finally have someone on my side, even if she doesn’t know the truth.
Mom hooks her arm with mine, leading me away from the main area of the event to a quieter part of the field where only a couple of volunteers are lingering, but thankfully, none of them are in earshot.
The few inches of height I have on her don’t feel like much at the moment, and I know she said she wasn’t going to yell, but I think I have good reason for being a little doubtful. “Are you ready for the game tomorrow?” Mom asks, a proud glimmer in her pale blue eyes.
What is she up to? I say stupid things, but I’m not dumb. I know she wants to talk about Mirabelle, so why is she asking about football? Normally, if Mom has something to say, she just says it.
“I’ve never been more ready for a game,” I answer honestly. I’m in the best shape of my life, having worked harder than I ever have. I never imagined I would come so close to losing it before it was ever mine.
“I bet Mirabelle is excited to see her boyfriend in action,” she hums, and I feel my cheeks flush.
“Mom,” I complain, and her smile grows wider. I guess I don’t call her “Mom” as much as I should these days. Penelope married my dad when I was eight, so I was old enough to understand that my biological mother didn’t want me. I loved Penelope, but when I found out they were getting married, I fought against it because the only thing worse than one mother rejecting me, would be two mothers rejecting me.
I had Thalia as a maternal figure, and I knew she would never go anywhere. Her love wasn’t conditional on my dad’s love, so why did I need someone else who was only going to leave?
But then Thalia helped me see that Penelope didn’t love me because of her relationship with my dad. She wanted me, and it was safe for me to let her be my mom in every way that counted.
“J’ai toujours espéré, qu’un jour, vous finissiez ensemble.”14
I feel slightly guilty for lying to her, but as much as I’d like to tell her it’s not real between us, I’d only be putting her in a bad spot with everyone else.
I don’t know what to say.
I muster a smile, but her eyes narrow, analyzing my face quickly. “What’s wrong, Henry?”
Everything.
My dad is disappointed in me.
Sebastian and Thalia think I’m forcing myself on their daughter and won’t even look in my direction.
I can’t talk to my sister about what’s going on because she’s a teenage girl and I’m afraid she’d spill the beans accidentally, leaving me in a worse position than before.
Andrew is in Seattle.
My career is in jeopardy because I’ll never live up to the legacy Sebastian left behind in the organization.
All the pressure I feel is constantly threatening to crush me into a speck of dust, and the only time I feel like I can breathe, is when I’m with Mirabelle. She makes me feel like all of this is going to be okay, even without knowing how deep my anxiety runs.
