Page 115 of Before You
Kaden turns his attention to me, sizing me up, and I mean, Marley’snotwrong. Even just one of us there would probably be enough to at least make an intruder second-guess coming through an unlocked door, let alone two of us.
“Can you crush someone’s head between your thighs?” he asks, and this time, I do choke.
Hayes swears under his breath, low enough I can’t hear. Marley drops her fork on her plate to cover her face with her hands, and I’m really not sure what the right way to react is when Sephine starts laughing.
I clear my throat, taking a sip of my water to help, but my voice is still hoarse when I speak. “I can’t say I’ve ever tried, or I’d let an intruder stick their head between my legs?”
Marley erupts into a fit of giggles, joining her mom and she shakes her head. “I’m sorry, it’s not funny,” she says, peeking at me before more laughter spills from her.
Honestly, it is a little funny to picture, but it’s a good thing Marley doesn’t have thighs the size of mine, or I’d be a goner from all the time I like to spend between them.
Oh shit, definitely not the right thoughts to be having at the table with her family.
“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear any of this,” Hayes says, taking a bite of his chicken. “I think I miss how quiet it is when they’re gone,” he muses, and Sephine rolls her eyes.
“And I think you’re a liar.”
A leg nudges mine, and I glance in Marley’s direction, finding her blue eyes crinkled with happiness at the corners, and I can’t help but smile.
Regardless of what lies ahead for us, I’ll never stop trying to be the man she thinks I am.
CHAPTER FORTY
Marley
“SO?” JJ ASKS, bumping his hip against mine.
I look up at him, my cheeks cold from the freezing chill in the air. “So what?” I ask, waiting for further clarification.
He motions around us, the blankets of snow covering the ground as we walk through Central Park, a soft glow cast on his face from the twinkling lights strung up. This is one of my favorite times of year, and while I might have a love-hate relationship with New York, I love how magical the city becomes for the holidays. “Has this date been everything you hoped it would be? You got the whole restaurant to sing happy birthday to me, we have the hot chocolate, the Christmas lights, the snow, the perfect boyfriend. Pretty sure we’ve checked everything on your list for tonight.”
He’s not wrong—JJisthe perfect boyfriend.
“Everything and more,” I say, smiling up at him. He seems good. JJ’s been going to meetings consistently, and he’s holding himself differently, almost like he’s starting to believe in himself again.
“I’m glad. You deserve the world, but I’d give you the entire universe if I could. Thank you for giving me the best birthday,” JJ says, wrapping an arm around my shoulders, leaning to press a kiss to the top of my head as I melt into him.
He makes it so easy to love him.
“I know I haven’t been the most fun to be around the last few weeks, but I really appreciate how patient you’ve been with me,” I say, adjusting my grip on the cup of hot chocolate in my hands, grateful for my gloves.
“If there’s one word to describe me, it’d be patient,” he jokes, while we walk through the light layer of snow collecting on the sidewalk.
I chuckle because he’s not wrong. I’ve never met someone like JJ before, and I probably never will again. “Fair point. I guess what I’m trying to say is it means a lot. I know you’ve got a lot going on, and I just . . . I love you. Thank you for making me feel seen.”
“Sweetheart, you’re the first thing I look for when I step into a room. I always see you,” JJ says, his smooth voice deepening, and I wrap my arm around his lower back in return. “I wasn’t always this person everyone had to babysit to make sure I wouldn’t break. I used to be reliable, and not someone who has to fight the urge to numb everything wit—” he falters, and I refuse to let go of JJ while he clears his throat. “With pills. I don’t like being like this, but I’m trying to be better.”
“You are reliable, JJ. Your addiction and the pills don’t define you as a person, and you’ve been working so hard to stay clean. I’m so proud of you,amore mio,” I say, looking up at him. I wish I could take away all of JJ’s struggles and pain because I can’t think of anyone less deserving to carry the weight of the world on their shoulders than the man in front of me.
There are a few snowflakes collecting in his dark lashes, and his eyes are trained on me, trusting me with his bruised heart.
I wonder if Bailey has ever regretted leaving, because speaking from experience, JJ’s not an easy person to walk away from, let alone his entire family. I can’t help but think there’s more to it than any of the theories they suspect.
“You have a way of making me feel seen too,” JJ murmurs, and my gaze drops to his soft lips before drifting back up to his emerald gaze.
His hand lifts to brush his thumb over my cheek, the cashmere material tickling my skin. “Do you ever think about how crazy it is we found each other again, and now we’re here celebrating your birthday?” I ask, and his smile is a gift I once only dreamed of.
“I never had a doubt about finding you, Marley. You’re my once in a lifetime too,” he says, and the fact he remembers the lyrics from the song I sang to him means more to me than anything else. I feel like my heart might explode from the depth of my feelings for him.
