Page 36 of Before You
I like Luka, but he has awful taste in picking a best friend, because Trent would be the absolute last person I’d ever want to hold that title. I spend every day watching him do one of three things: one day, Trent misses Marley, and the next, he’s claiming she cheated on him with some guy who left a flower at her door, or he’s fucking his way through the cheerleaders.
It’s taking everything in me not to beat the shit out of Trent when he talks about Marley. I don’t even care if Trent finds out I’m the one who left the flower for her.
Purple roses signify love at first sight, and I can’t think of a better way to describe my feelings for Marley. I’ve loved her from the moment I laid eyes on her, and I never stopped. I know what flowers mean in my family, and there is zero doubt in my mind Marley is my forever person. All I can hope is I’m hers, too.
I pass the controller to Luka as Asher turns the television back on, just as my phone rings next to me on the couch. I grab it, and the second I see the screen, everything around me fades into background noise.
Blocked caller.
It’s him.
I stand up immediately, sprinting up the stairs to escape to my room. My fingers are shaking as I accept the call, my chest tightening painfully. “Bailey?”
There’s a hoarse cough, and finally, I hear my little brother’s voice for the first time in nearly four months. “Hi.”
“Are you okay?” I ask, sitting at my desk. I grab the piece of paper I tried—and failed—to write a letter on to Marley lastnight and my pen, straining to hear anything in the background I can tell the private investigator.
Bailey sighs, coughing again. “I’m okay. Sorry I haven’t called. It took me longer than normal to get a phone.”
He doesn’t sound okay.“Where are you?” I ask this every time, hoping it will finally be the time he tells me.
Unfortunately, today isn’t that day. “Somewhere safe,” Bailey answers, but I’m not sure I believe him. I don’t think he’d tell me if he wasn’t safe, and the possibility terrifies the hell out of me.
“Bailey,please, tell me where you are.”
“You know I can’t tell you because you’ll tell them. I’m not ready, JJ.” He doesn’t sound angry, he sounds tired.
I bet it’s exhausting carrying around so much anger all the time.
“Mom and Dad miss you. They don’t care about the past. They love you so much, B. They just want you to come home—we all do.Hunter and Mirabelle—”
I’m cut off by Bailey’s now sharp tone.“No.”
I feel my stomach twist, and I drag a hand over my face, feeling the stubble growing on my jaw after skipping shaving for a few days.“Okay,”I say, conceding before I push him too far. “Do you need me to send you anything? Money? Food? Clothes? A phone?”Anything he wants, and I’ll give it to him.
“I’m fine, JJ. I don’t need anything—just checking in.”
I bite back the scream begging to escape my lungs. There’s no way whatever money Bailey took with him has lasted this long. If he would accept just once, I’d stop feeling so damn useless because it’d give us a shot at finding him. Bailey’s not stupid, though.
“I love you,” I say instead, refusing to miss a chance of letting my brother know no matter what’s happened, that hasn’t changed.
“I love you too.”
“Please, Bailey. Please come home,” I whisper.
I hear yelling in the background on Bailey’s end, but it’s too indistinct for me to distinguish anything specific. “Shit, I have to go.”
“Wait,”I blurt out, panic flooding my system. I need more time. I’m not ready for the clock to restart.
“I’ll call soon. Tell everyone to stop looking for me. I don’t want to be found.”
And then Bailey hangs up, ending the call as I sit there in pure agony, knowing I can’t fix this. The pain is too much, and everything is too damn loud. I need it to stop.
I drop the pen on the unfinished letter, my chest tightening as I try to figure out what exactly Ihaveto relay from his call, and what I can carry myself.
I spot the bottle on the corner of my desk, sitting in front of a picture of my family after one of Dad’s games. I know I shouldn’t, but I still pop two pills in my mouth to swallow them dry as the memory of that day taunts me, craving the sense of calm they bring. Grabbing the frame, I shove it in one of the drawers, slamming it shut before beginning the round of calls to inform my broken family I heard from Bailey.
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