Page 91 of Before You
“I’m not. It meant a lot to me you even tried,” JJ says sweetly, and I hear the music start to come to life in my head already as I look at him.
It feels cliché to think, but everything about tonight is perfect, right down to the person I’m with.
I slipped into his hoodie after eating, greedily inhaling the addicting scent of citrus and detergent clinging to the fabric while JJ insisted on packing everything up to run it back to thecar quickly so we could watch the sunset. I guess he had asked Asher to help him set up and watch over everything while he picked me up so it would already be ready when we arrived.
JJ found me again at the edge of the water, my toes slowly disappearing into the sand. The breeze tousles his dark hair, lifting the short strands out of his face as the setting sun casts a soft glow on his devastating features when I look up at him.
“Do you ever think about how many times we were in the same place without ever knowing?” I ask, feeling JJ’s fingertips brush against mine, causing sparks to dance across my skin before hooking his pinky around mine. The simple touch threatens to pour fuel on the simmering fire in me, but the burn is one I’d welcome since JJ’s already consumed every fiber of my being.
“I looked for your face in every face of every place I went during the eight hundred and ninety-two days until I saw you again. I would have known in my heart if we were in the same place at the same time,” he says, his voice smooth like crushed velvet as my heart skips a beat. “For the longest time, I thought I was meant to only love the memory of you, and now I can’t help wondering if I’m dreaming,” JJ says, his gaze sliding to meet mine, and I think I fall in love with him all over again. “It doesn’t feel real being here with you, but I’m so damn glad it is.”
Just when I think he can’t get any better, JJ goes and says the most romantic thing I think I’ve ever heard.“I felt the same way the first time we met,” I say, wishing I could say more, but I can already feel the tears welling in my eyes, threatening to fall from the sheer power of his love.
“You asked if I was real,” he recalls, a soft chuckle rumbling from his chest.
There is no doubt in my mind JJ has replayed our time in his head as many times as I have from every minute detail he’s been able to pull out from seemingly nowhere at any given moment.
“And you promised me you were, just like I’m promising you I’m really here with you.”
I wonder if there’s a limit to how many times I can fall in love with JJ?
“I love you,” JJ says, squeezing my hand in return.
“I love you too, Jonathan Jacob.”
JJ tips his head back, a beautiful laugh spilling from him, and Icherishthe sound of it. I grin at him, and the pure joy radiating on his face is more breathtaking than the sky above us ranging from hues of yellow, burnt orange, and purple.
“You’re my favorite person,” I say, watching as the intensity of his expression shifts into something resembling surprise while he turns to face me, his full lips parted. “I haven’t had many choices in my life, but if choosing you is the last one I get to make, I wouldn’t change a single thing.”
JJ’s throat bobs as he watches me, his hand lifting to brush my hair out of my face with a tenderness that makes me feel like I’m floating on cloud nine before cupping the back of my neck. I reach up, holding his arm, happy to have finally said something to make him the same way he always makes me feel.
I recognize the look in his eyes, and my gaze drops to his mouth, taking my time on the way back up. “Hey, JJ?”
“What?”
“You look like you want to kiss me,” I tease, smiling cheekily at him.
“I absolutely do,” he says, leaning down while his other hand curves around my lower back, tugging me closer to him. “I can’t tell you how lucky I feel to be your favorite person.”
“It’s not luck. It’syou.”
Everything feels so right when JJ leans down as I rise up to meet him, his lips slanting over mine.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
JJ
MY EYES FLASH open as my shoulder is shaken, pulling me from sleep. “JJ, your phone,” Marley says, and the tightrope I’ve been teetering on to stay clean the past few weeks snaps, sending me headfirst into the chasm below. There’s only one person who would call me in the middle of the night.
I note the blocked caller ID on the screen as she hands it to me, answering it before it disappears. “Bailey?” I ask, while Marley flips her lamp on, casting the room in a soft glow.
“Yeah, it’s me,” Bailey says, followed by a quiet sigh. “I’m sorry for calling so late.”
“No,” I blurt out. “Don’t ever apologize for calling. I’m here anytime you need me.”Please don’t hang up, Bailey.Give me something—anything.
“Thanks for answering.”
“Always, B,” I say, the nickname rolling off my tongue, feeling tears prick my eyes. “Are you okay?”
