Page 95 of Before You
I only heard JJ’s half of the conversation, but from what it sounded like, his brother is homeless. I have so many questions, but I’m terrified to ask JJ about Bailey in case it affects him the same way the call did last night.
Maybe I shouldn’t have done it, but I reached out to Mirabelle before my class, asking her if she could call me because I think the only way to help JJ is by having the full picture to fully understand what’s going on with him.
She times it perfectly, though, calling me the second I step out of the building. “Hey, Mira,” I greet, resisting the urge to yawn despite the third cup of coffee I finished a little bit ago.
“Do I get to call you my sister yet?” she asks, and a laugh slips from me.
“I’m not sure I even want to ask what you mean by sister?”
Mirabelle laughs, and I feel bad knowing I’m about to ruin her afternoon, especially after the way everyone reacted when JJ mentioned Bailey in front of their family. “You’ll know soon enough I’m sure.”
“If you say so.” I put in an earbud so I can walk without holding my phone up to my ear, tucking my hands into the sleeves of the hoodie I kept from JJ, with zero intention of giving it back. “Listen, I’m sorry to do this over a phone call, but I need to ask you about something I’m not sure I can ask JJ.”
The jovial tone in Mirabelle’s voice drops immediately. “Is everything okay? What happened?”
I can’t tell her about JJ’s . . . episode last night without revealing the call from Bailey, and I don’t know if JJ’s told his family about it yet. I think it’s safe to assume he hasn’t after the way this call started.
Tread carefully, Marley.“Everything’s fine,” I lie, immediately feeling guilty for doing it, but I’m caught between a rock and a hard place right now.What was I thinking calling Mirabelle? This was dumb.“He mentioned it’s getting closer to the time Bailey calls, and I can tell he’s more anxious, so I wanted to ask if you could tell me more about Bailey?”I hope she doesn’t push harder.
Her sharp inhale is another punch to the gut, but I have to know. Mirabelle clears her throat, and I cross my arms over my chest as I turn toward the far parking lot. “So JJ, Henry, and I have a lot of theories about why everything went down the way it did with Bailey, but what we’ve speculated is Bailey found out about a gap in our parents’ relationship none of us knew about, but we think the information he discovered was wrong. I don’t know why he didn’t talk to our parents about it himself, buthe was mad at me at the time for hiding my relationship with Henry. I think there were probably other things going on we don’t know about too, but we didn’t know how bad things were until it was too late.
“Bailey set the house we grew up in on fire. The only reason we know now is because Bailey told Henry and me after we found him in front of another fire at the beach house my parents currently live in, the day before he ran away while my parents were in Europe. He said something about Hunter lying about Kaitlyn, and Henry admitted he knew Kaitlyn and Bailey kissed at some point, but he didn’t know anything more. Maybe it’s wrong of us, but we’ve kept Hunter in the dark because what good will it do to make him feel guiltier about his twin leaving?
“Honestly, I’ve replayed the conversation in my mind a thousand times, but Bailey was really specific about JJ being the only one who hadn’t lied to him, which is why we’re assuming he’s the only one B calls.”
I’m impressed they’ve managed to keep this out of the press as long as they have. “I’m really sorry you guys are going through this,” I say as Mirabelle sniffles.
“He’ll come back, so there’s no reason to apologize,” she says, but all I can picture is the look of despair on JJ’s face when he admitted to me how he believes if Bailey were going to come back, he would have by now. Everything is starting to make a lot more sense now, especially JJ’s anxiety about the calls.
Mira and I never told Mom and Dad what you did,is what JJ said last night.
“Your parents don’t know about the fire, do they?” I ask, connecting the dots as I turn toward the parking lot at the far end of campus. I almost wish I had early morning classes to have an excuse to get here earlier to find better parking before it’s all gone.
“No, they don’t know. I mean, you saw their reaction when JJ said his name. Hunt wasn’t wrong when he said they look for Bailey in him.”
I hate this for all of them, and I wish I could say if I were put in their position, I’d do things differently, but would I? If Kaden were the one to run away, and I was the only one he spoke to, would I be able to look at my parents and tell them he’s living on the streets?
All I know for certain is I can’t blame JJ for beginning to suffocate under the pressure he puts on himself.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
JJ
TODAY WAS A fucking nightmare, every horrible moment replaying on a loop in my mind. The way I did everything possible to try and help my team today, but the reality is with my brace on, I’m not anywhere near as fast as I need to be. It’s the worst game I’ve had in a long time, and the other team took full advantage of our missed connections on the field.
My hands clench, and I need to hit something. I need to feel something because the urge to feel nothing has me by the throat, especially after my slip.
I know it’s going to take time for my knee to fully recover, especially after the hell I’ve put it through the last few months. I can’t expect it to be perfect like it was when I couldn’t feel anything.
My anger bubbles over despite the shower I hastily took with the hope of it helping me shake my mood before I go to find Marley. My teammates have given me a wide berth since we entered the locker room, and I’m disappointed in myself for letting them down.
It’s fine. I’m fine.
I ignore the looks from my teammates. I’m not one to normally get heated over games, but right now I’m struggling to find what my new normal is. It was different last season becauseI couldn’t do a damn thing about it while recovering from my surgery, but this time I could have made a difference, and we still lost.
“You good?” Ash asks from my left, and I grab a shirt out of my locker, pulling it over my head.
“Perfect.”
