Page 92 of A Duke Changes Everything
Chapter Twenty-Two
Mina hadn’t imagined anything could hurt as badly as the loss of her father. But this was worse, because Nick wasn’t gone. He was standing right in front of her, and yet he was so far away.
He couldn’t tell her that he loved her. In fact, he said nothing at all and only gave a tight twist of his head.
Tears threatened and she turned, desperate to compose herself. Blubbering wouldn’t help.Never let your struggles be known.Her father’s voice rang in her ears.
Then Nick’s voice, soft and deep. “I’ll give you everything I have, Mina. Please answer.”
She sniffed and faced him. “I am honored by your—”
“No. Don’t do that. No niceties between us. Tell me to go to hell, but spare me your politely couched rejection.”
“It’s not a rejection.”
“Then you’ll marry me?” His head snapped up.
An answer welled up inside her, like a living thing demanding to get out.Yes, yes.Marry a duke? Become a duchess when she had no claim to the title through breeding or blood? What woman wouldn’t embrace such a proposal with both hands?
But as perfect as the hours had been in Nick’s arms, something about this felt terribly wrong. As if he’d offered her a beautiful gilded box with nothing inside. A shell of what she truly wanted, with nothing at its heart. He proposed a marriage of separation. Living as wedded strangers, growing apart rather than getting to know each other better.
She couldn’t bear that sort of marriage. Not with Nick.
Her father’s voice intruded.Better one bird in hand than ten in the woods.
He’d liked aphorisms. Sayings he drilled into her head. All in an attempt to teach qualities he wished her to possess. There were so many lessons he’d hoped she might learn. One had to do with taking what was before you rather than wishing for more.
Now Nick stood in front of her, looking gorgeous in his rumpled, untucked shirt, with stubble shadowing his jaw, hope glowing in his extraordinary eyes. A duke of the realm who deigned to make an estate steward’s daughter his duchess. A man who was offering her Enderley, not as a place of duty, but as a home that was the only belonging she’d ever known.
And foolishly, selfishly, she wanted more.
“I don’t—”
A knock sounded at the door.
Nick stomped over and nearly ripped the thick slab of wood from its hinges. “What?”
“Your carriage is ready, sir.” Mr. Spencer kept his voice low. “Shall I send up a breakfast tray before you depart?”
“No.” Mina fought to keep her voice steady. “Thank you, but I’d like to leave as soon as possible.”
Nick’s jaw worked back and forth. “We’ll be up directly.” He stared at the floor, speaking to both of them but unwilling to look either of them in the eyes.
When the club manager had gone, Nick slammed the door behind him. He kept his hand flat on the polished wood, his back to her.
“Don’t answer now,” he said roughly. “This is all very sudden.”
He tipped her a glance over his shoulder. A smile curved his mouth but didn’t touch his eyes.
“Neither of us planned what happened last evening. I want you to be sure, Mina. Take a couple of days to consider and give me your answer once we’re back at Enderley.”
“I didn’t think you’d go back.” The time he’d vowed to spend there was almost over, and Mina knew it was the last place he wished to be. “Why are you returning?”
“Because you are.” His lips trembled when he faced her again. There was a wobble in his chin that betrayed the coolness in his gaze. “Also, I’ve left commitments unfinished. Repair projects in the village and that bloody country dance I promised Mrs. Shepard I’d attend.”
“And will you attend Lady Claxton’s ball too?”
“I won’t go unless you do.” An inky brow winged up, and his grin slid into a smirk. He seemed to enjoy issuing the challenge, but he didn’t understand Barrowmere society as well as she did.
