Page 30 of Her Rogue to Ruin
Last night, he’d found that he quite liked her eyes on him, studying him, while she worked.
Phin realized he’d fallen silent and lifted his gaze to Selkirk’s. His friend merely arched a brow, as if urging him to get on with it.
“I’ve simply changed my mind.” Phin waited to see if that explanation would satisfy.
“Very well.” Selkirk nodded. “I shall have a word with Mrs. Grove.”
“In the least offensive terms.”
“Of course. Though the lady has enough noblemen vying for her, I doubt she’ll be too shattered.”
Phin agreed. He’d spoken to her once. They’d barely developed a rapport.
Selkirk let out a long sigh and stared at the firelight. “Well,” he said after a while, “at least that means you won’t have to risk offending the pretty widow by asking her to paint you without a thread on.”
Phin had never lied to Adrian Selkirk. Not in two decades of friendship. It stunned him that he was considering doing so now. An indication of how far gone he was in regard to Portia. But he couldn’t do it.
“I did ask her.”
“Did you? How did that go?” Selkirk bent forward, more interested than he’d been in anything else Phin had said.
“She initially declined and then changed her mind.”
Selkirk’s mouth quirked in a half-smile. “And now you’ve changed yours, so it’s all for naught.”
“Or not.”
Selkirk let out a bark of laughter. “You’re going to have her paint you regardless? What the bloody hell for? Fun?”
Phin pressed his hand to his mouth, wondering how much to confess.
“Oh,” Selkirk said slowly, drawing out the sound. “She’s already started the painting.”
“Yes.”
“I can understand not wishing to cheat the lady of a commission. You could always pay her for the trouble and forego the artwork.”
“No.” Phin hated the idea of anything that diminished his reasons for spending time with Portia. “I want her to continue.”
Selkirk watched him, read him, as he always seemed to do so well. “No, you want to see her. Spend time with her. You’re going to seduce her.” Selkirk grinned. “I should box your ears.”
Phin reached for his glass and swigged down a mouthful.
“What is it? Something about this is troubling you.” Selkirk never failed to surmise the truth, whether Phin confessed it or not.
“She asked me to teach her. To give her…lessons in seduction.” Phin all but whispered the words. “But she needs no lessons. She has me on tenterhooks, and I’m not sure she even knows it.”
Selkirk lifted his hand as if offering up the answer. “Tell her, man. You must tell her.”
Could he do that? He knew she desired him. There was no mistaking the mutual nature of their attraction.
But what he couldn’t overcome was the question ringing in his mind.What then?
Affairs were finite things. A few trysts. A month. Maybe years if one kept a woman like Mrs. Grove. But they were conducted in fits and starts. Secret assignations. Rendezvous in the dark of night.
He didn’t wish to keep Portia a secret. And he didn’t wish to think of the end before they’d begun.
He felt, even now, that he owed her more than that. That he wanted more than that. His feelings were fighting so hard against the restraints he usually imposed, he wasn’t certain he could rein them in when it came to Portia. But he would have to.
