Page 19 of Frost and Death
I snort, knowing he hit the target. “Something like that.”
A grin appears as we climb up the stairs faster than I am used to, hating the height difference between the two of us. Chest tightening at the change of pace, I grip my dress as I concentrate on my steps, always struggling to keep up with Niko’s long strides.
“What happened, then? Why do I feel like you are so distant?”
I hesitate in my response, unsure of the distance he is talking about. But I replay my interaction with the mystery man from earlier, remembering his soft touches and the circles that reminded me of my sister.
Just like that, another little dose of happiness vanishes to be replaced with misery.
I deflate as the brief glimpse of joy dwindles away, allowing my darkness to consume me. I glower and find myself cracking apart at the seams as we pass up the final step to my rooms at the end of the hall.
Niko pulls me to a stop, dragging me away from the blizzard I battle internally. “Tee?” Concern weighs down on his brow as I scratch the side of my fingers in distraction.
“I was thinking about Runa,” I confess, avoiding his eyes.
Suddenly, I am embraced by the soothing scents of sandalwood. I melt into it, closing my eyes and placing my arms around Niko.
Deities, he is so soft.
Thoughts wander as I lean against his chest. It is as if he holds and protects me from the world. I dream of these days so often, every day, of having him so close to me like this. My lungs finally exhale when Niko’s huge arms squeeze me once more.
Why can’t it always be this easy?
When we break away, he forces my gaze up to him. I still when his thumb strokes the side of my jaw.
He leans in through a hushed whisper. “I don’t want you to think about Runa right now.”
My eyes widen as his eyes close, lips mere inches from mine. I lick mine in earnest as lust explodes in my stomach. Nerves rapid firing, I feel as if he might kiss me.
Sweet Makers, this could be my first kiss.
I’ve fantasized about kissing this man for years, but an ache pulses against my chest as I hesitate.
Am I reading him all wrong? Is this part of our game?
What if he is just as tired as I am and is closing his eyes because he, too, is exhausted?
Oh, Sweet Makers, what is the matter with you, Tove? Just KISS him!
I-I… I can’t.
Deities, I can’t believe I am a fucking coward. I inwardly groan as I guide his hand slowly,painfully, away from my face. I drop my head and close my eyes, trying to sear this memory into my brain, knowing all too well I am most likely hallucinating.
This will never happen again. A memory I will have to use in future fantasies.
I avert my eyes from his gaze, reaching for the door to my chambers.
“Tee,” he starts, and I halt. “Before you leave, I need you to do something for me.”
Curiosity gets the better of me. “What is it, Niko?”
His lip curves up as he grabs my hand, placing it on his chest.
I swallow the lump forming when he traces along my palm, hoping he cannot see the goose bumps he is causing.
His soft voice is swiftly replaced by a hard sternness. “Don’t talk to the last man you danced with.”
“Why?” I tug my hand back and fold my arms.
