Page 28 of Frost and Death
He looks as if I slapped him. Niko reaches for me. “I think you should reconsider, Tee—”
“I don’t care what you think, Nikolaj!”
He flinches.
I don’t care. I can’t allow myself to care. I must push him away if I am to save him.
He tries to speak, but the ice inside of me is awake and growing.
The Snow Queen is here.
I mirror the disgust he’s holding on to his face. “I willnotreconsider,Nikolaj.”
Clinging to the fury, I use the torment of his words to fuel my wretchedness. Even though heaviness seeps into my chest, rage isn’t hot in my blood. It’s frost.
The chilling caress at the top of my spine is gladly welcomed, as is the frigid winter washing over me.
Niko gapes at my breath turning visible.
My tear-stricken eyes strain to focus on him, but I lean into rage rather than despair. I have never been one to display fury around others, but I enforce it now as my gaze pierces through him with coldness.
“As you have sokindlyreminded me, time and time again, I need to do this for the kingdom. I need to find someone to marry, and it’s like you said.”
He eyes me silently, aware of the visible breath escaping from my lips.
“Any man I choose will behonoredI chose him,” I say as I fight against the spasm exploding in my stomach.
I stare at Niko, seeing the hint of fear and disgust behind his eyes. I lean in, venom lacing each syllable, driving the statement home.
“Because I am afuckingqueen.”
He is completely still, the person standing before him, someone he, too, has never seen.
Good.
I point to the exit, breathing deep and fighting against feeding my power what it wants. “And no matter how much I might have wanted it to be you, it won’t be. Now,leave.”
We stare each other down, my heart pulsing in tandem with either my magic or loneliness, but ruination lurks over me.
Niko studies me for a few pauses, looking as if he wants to say something, but I keep my finger pointed at the door.
He rises—leaving my room without even looking back.
I remain glued to my place, listening for his footsteps to recede before dropping my hand. Kneeling over, I clutch my stomach in agony, my power flickering away from the full force of pain radiating throughout my body.
I crumple to the floor, my head falling forward on my bed as more tears dampen my sheets. I fight against prying apart Niko’s words, trying to convince myself he didn’t mean what he said. Maybe I needed to hear him say those things, needed to put to rest the feelings I have for him and do my duty.
It doesn’t make me feel any better that I lashed right back.
Betina’s sweet voice enters the room. “Tove?”
My beautiful friend holds a tray of medicine. As she sees my pained face, a choked whimper escapes me, and heartbreak returns, knowing I should push Betina away, too.
“Oh, Tove.”
Her voice cracks as she hurries to me, holding me close.
She helps me into bed before giving me medicine.
