Page 175 of Beast and Remedy
Constantly Changing
The rippling power I was accustomed to thrummed in my veins until I transformed. And with each willful change, that force has ebbed from being a need to one of leisure, allowing me more control of myself in this form.
But while I shifted faster with the least amount of pain I’ve ever experienced, a sharp awareness of magic still clung to me—beckoned me to remain a bear.
Shortly before dawn, the esprit appeared, accompanying us and showing us different elements of the woods I hadn’t paid much attention to. And through it all, Beau never once left my side.
He remained armed at the ready and completely unbothered by my beast form. Occasionally, he would stroke my fur, and I would rumble with pleasure.
His scent is intoxicating and delicious, comforting me as he pets my coat once more. “Are you doing alright?”
The esprit twirls as I lower my head once, communicating yes.
Beau and I established yes-or-no questions would be best if we needed to talk when I was a bear, agreeing one nod meant yes, and nothing or a shake of my head was no.
But if I was feeling good, two nods meant I love you.
We saunter forward in silence, and I dip my head twice, earning a sweet, melodic chuckle from Beau.
A hum of joy emanates from the esprit shimmering beside us.“She must be feeling really good today,”it muses.
I nod once, wishing that flashing my teeth wouldn’t come across as threatening. Smiling would better convey how I feel.
Witnessing Marian’s first hallucination yanked away the control I finally felt I had over the infection, but I’ve gained more time to understand my abilities. I can’t help the semblance of hope returning.
I can barely process, let alone explain, how profound—how eye opening—it is.
Over the span of a few days, altering my mindset and my intentions and feelings about my gifts changedeverything. Transitioning is getting easier, and the pain is more manageable.
During my shift last night, I channeled my magic beyond breaking my bones. I used the heat and rush of warmth it drew, funneling it toward each crack, each stretching muscle like a balm.
It felt eerily close to how Beau's powers feel on me, and even he gaped in awe and shock as I rushed to explain before my face altered.
The tugs of protection, irritability, and ruling over a dominion no longer shove my will into the back of my mind. Rather they work with me versus against me.
But above all, for the first time since gaining these abilities, the beast and I don’t feel like two separate forms.
Theyfinallyfeel like one and the same.
“This is where I must leave you,”the esprit says, forcing us to a stop. It bounces back, weaving through the trees before spinning.“Do you hear it?”
I wiggle my ears, freezing at a soft melody thrumming to life.
The esprit sways to the rhythm, drifting toward a bush.
Beau inhales sharply, and I whip my head, a growl thundering in preparation for any threat. But he points past us.
“Look,” he breathes, and I veer back to more floating embers coming forward.
Beau and I watch with silent reverence, marveling in awe as one by one, more esprits appear.
Each one adds volume to the song of the forest, weaving in tandem to the beat. They break into varying harmonies, the magnificence of them all stealing my breath.
The aura surrounding us sparkles with the esprits, and the faintest traces of dawn illuminate the area in hues of orange, yellow, red, and pink.
The ambience is comforting as the chanting esprits encircle Beau and me. Their melody is euphoric and captivating, reaching to the depths of my magic—mysoul.
Our esprit drifts close when the tune ends.“The heart of the forest lies in us,”it says, before sweeping near my snout and touching it.“And lies in you now, too.”
