Page 99 of Secrets in Love
The home that had been so full of love and light just twenty-four hours ago was unrecognizable. Finn remained locked in his room, playing the saddest music Australia had produced on repeat and refusing to divulge the source of his doldrums. After thousands of calls, emails, and texts from Scarlett, I was none the wiser. Because other than implying he’d somehow made a fool of himself, Scarlett refused to say more. “That’s Finn’s story to tell. Just tell him to call me. Please.”
Between fretting over Finn and overanalyzing everything with Nate, I had the shittiest of shit sleeps. When the haze-tinted sun finally rose the next morning, the realization that no part of me deserved the man that lay beside me came with it. Nate was forgiving, wonderful, and caring even when I had been an Elsa-level ice queen. My shitty attitude was going to ruin everything, and I had no idea how to change it. I felt lost. Useless. Undeserving and absolutely overwhelmed.
With my eyes hanging from my head, I left Nate and Jocelyn to take care of the big, giant man-baby, took Iris to school, and headed to work. I should have had more sympathy for him, but I was tired. It was just easier to switch my concern into snark. “Finn is a massive drama queen,” I told myself. And he was. Honestly, he could have been sulking over anything—from Scarlett using the last of his expensive curly hair conditioner to them breaking up. I hoped to God it wasn’t the latter. That man had suffered so much loss. I dreaded thinking how he’d cope if he lost Scarlett too.
Iris was full of questions about her sad daddy on the walk, but I managed to answer most tactfully, and those I couldn’t were silenced by buying her a smoothie half her size.
As soon as Iris was safely in the school gates, the heavens opened. I was drenched and mega pissed off by the time I arrived at the studio. Seeing Christian pacing the entry didn’t improve matters.
“Good morning, Evie. Jody and I need a word with you in her office.” Yep, the day’s fate was sealed. It was a shit one…or was it? “We recognize your contributions to VAAD in the short time you’ve been here. Loyalty and perseverance, your unbelievable work ethic, and most of all, the compassion and strength you have demonstrated. Not many people were willing to do what you’ve done for me, Evie. Especially after I teased Nate like that. Your forgiveness has helped me stay sober, and your talent and empathy deserve recognition and reward. We want to make you an equal partner in VAAD. Will you consider it?”
My mood swing gave me whiplash. “I don’t need to consider anything. Yes. I say yes!”
Both seemed surprised by my eagerness. “Are you sure? There is a lot involved, and not just work-wise. Financially too. It’s a big commitment, and I know Nate still wants you to return to Australia. Before we do anything, you need to make sure—”
“I am sure, Jody. Nate and I have already talked, and he is staying with me in New York. I’m ready to do this. Whatever it takes. I didn’t know I wanted this as badly as I do, but I really want it.”
I jumped on poor Jody, wrapping her into a fearsome hug, then released her and shifted into an awkward handshake with Christian. I’d rather have chewed my hand off than touch him, but considering the opportunity he’d handed me, it was the least I could do. “We’re really happy that you’re so happy. It will take a few weeks to get the paperwork sorted, especially with Christmas looming. Things may not be sorted till the New Year. But, unofficially, welcome aboard. Partner.”
Walking—no, running—home down Sixth Avenue, I had the feeling that, for once, things were looking up for me. And maybe the good vibes would infiltrate Finn. I had a job I loved. I was going to be a business owner. Nate chose me, was staying in New York for me, and when I got home, I was going to tell him I loved him. My life was back to being a dream.
Within seconds of entering the safety and sanctity of our room, I remembered why I wore crotchety as a badge of honor and positivity could go get fucked: dreamsalwayscame to an end because no matter how hard you tried, there was always a rude awakening.
“Please don’t cry, Mum. We’ll be home as soon as we can. I promise…yep, the first flight I can get….yep. I’ll make sure I wait for a Qantas flight… Yes, I know they have the best safety record of all airlines.”
Nate’s sweet and reassuring conversation with his mum went on and on. That wasn’t the real issue. The issue was that while Nate was talking, he was packing, not just his things, but also mine, into the two matching suitcases on the bed.
“What are you doing? What’s with the suitcases?” I whispered, waving to get his attention.
Proving he’d spent too much time around me, Nate shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Mum, Evie is home. I’ve gotta go…yep…yep, I’ll get her to talk to you as soon as we’re done… No, Mum, I don’t mean sex. As soon as we are done talking and packing…yep, I’ll give you the flight number as soon as I get it. And don’t worry. Everything will be fine. It’s just a bump in the road.” He hung up, walked to me with his head down, and buried his face into my shoulder. “I’m so glad you’re home.”
“Me too. And I’ll be even happier if you answer my question. What are you doing?”
He didn’t move. He stayed buried. “I’m packing. We need to be at the airport in six hours. Unless you want to try and get a later flight.”
“Why are you talking to me like I know what the hell is happening? What flight to where?”
“Where do you think? Home, Gidge. We’re going home.”
Wriggling free of his clutches, I put a few paces between us. “I’m already home, Nathaniel. I thought you were too.”
“Yeah, well, things changed. Mum and Dad have pulled the pin on Fiji. Dad’s sick. He started hurling and hasn’t kept any fluids down. It’s not another stroke or anything, probably just the stomach flu or mild food poisoning, but he’s not as strong as he was, and Mum is freaking out. She thinks he can’t run the place on his own after all and wants us home asap. She’s bloody loopy, though. Even with Dad sick, she’s so excited to have you there, Gidge. She’s even discussing renovating your Mum and Dad’s place for a homecoming present.”
“Homecoming…Nate.” I sighed and covered my face to hide the tears welling.
“Eeevieee,” he mocked, disguising his fear and tears with sarcasm as he moved onto emptying my drawers. It was a tactic I knew well and had perfected. “We need to hustle, and I chose to start with your underwear.” I dropped onto the bed and watched him select his favorite bras and knickers. “Ooh, these are new…and deliciously pointless. I could see everything in them, Gidge. They are definitely coming home.”
“Stop and listen. I can’t come back with you.” Nate began to whistle. “Don’t ignore me. We need to sit down and talk about this. We never really talk about anything. We fight then fuck, but we can’t do that now. I’m not sure how often I have to say this, but if you need to hear it again, here it is one last time. Nate, I’m not—”
“Enough!” his bitter voice boomed through the room as he kicked the suitcases closed. “You don’t have to say it again. Christ, I thought once push came to shove… Evie, when I told you about the stroke, you told me you would have come home if you knew Dad was sick. Well, now he’s sick, and now you know. You also know Mum’s worried he can’t do everything alone. Do that math, Evie. One plus one equals two bums on a plane to Sydney.”
“Oh, and you just decided I’d be fine with this and started packing?”
“As you see.”
I jumped to my feet, ripped the case open, and began removing its contents. “Don’t do this. I’m sorry Barry is sick, but I told you from the start—”
Nate grabbed my wrist to stop me. “Give me a reason, and don’t you dare—”
