Page 44 of Kitty Season
Maybe he gathers knowledge through osmosis.
I feel a rough patting of my head. I think Noah means to be soothing. It’s not. “You. are. not. dumb. You, my friend, are lovesick.” I raise my head, just enough for Noah to see my eye roll. “I mean it. When I first started sneaking around with Lot, I could barely remember my name. All I thought of was her and the girls.” He unnecessarily cups his pecs like I didn’t know bythe girls, he meant her boobs.
“Yes but youwerewith Lotte, I’m notwiththem. I have no excuse.”
“Doesn’t matter. Think of it as offside. Quinn and Troye are the blue line you’ve been obsessively skating along for months?—”
“Ahh, could we call it obsessive?”
“Yes we could. Now, even if it’s by the tip of your blade, the offered threesome has pushed you over. You’re in their zone, baby. The—please, Brady, please dick us both down—zone.”
Poor Cindy Porter who’s sitting across from us, almost falls from her chair. “Shit, Noah. Wanna say it any louder? I’m not sure the couple making-out in the third floor stacks heard you.” Of course I blush and he laughs. “Why the hell did I tell you? Also, how did you even get in here? You’re not a student anymore.”
“Wendy on the front desk loves me.” He winks. “And stop changing the subject. Even if the stack fuckers did hear us, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Sex is a healthy part of life, so ipso-facto, sex between three people is even healthier.”
“Tell me, why are we friends again?”
“Ahh, because I am awesome and open and non judgmental and an ally, and can be trusted with anything. An-y-thing.”
“Thanks for spelling it out for me.”
“You’re welcome.” Pausing, he leans over the table and finally drops his voice, “Now, if this does happen, you need to think logistics. How do you feel about crossing swords? ‘Cause trust me, no matter how careful you are, it will happen. Some, not saying you, might even want it to happen. Again, not necessarily you, but who knows, ya know?”
A single bead of sweat busts from his temple and slides down his cheek. I can’t help but snort out laughter as he tries to discreetly wipe it away. He’s a clown, but he’s trying so freaking hard to supportive, while also being nosy as fuck.
“Fine, you wanna know if I’m up for it? Then yes. Of course I am. Kind of. I’ve wanted to be with Quinn from the second I saw her. Being with Quinn—even though I have no idea what I’m doing—is not the problem. It’s him. I hate?—”
“Ya, ya, ya, you hate him. But you know what they say?”
“Never take sex advice from an NHL player.”
“No, smart ass. There’s a fine line between love and hate.”
I almost gag on air.
“Love? Him. Troye? You’ve got to be kidding me. I ha—” I stop, catching myself before I can say it again. “I find it incomprehensibly frustrating and cruel that the opportunity to be with this incredible woman has finally arisen, but that opportunity is conditional on him being there, too.”
“Yes, well I find most of you just said incomprehensible, but I’m going with it. Just like you should the three-way. ‘Cause if you do, you know what else will be arisen? Brady Junior.”
“For fuck’s sake.”
Proud of his little joke, and firmly back in his comfort zone, Noah leans back in his chair and crosses his arm over his chest. “Now, I’m backtracking because you said something veryimportant, and I need to remind you just how lucky you are I’m here, ‘cause not only am I awesome, open, non-judgmental and trustworthy, I’m first and foremost?—”
“An ally? ‘Cause you forgot that one.”
“Oh, yeah, an ally. But also, a certified god of sexy times. Just ask Lotte.”
“Yeah, nah. I think I’ll be right.”
“Come on, Big D. You said you have no idea what you’re doing, and I can help with that. Quinn may be with Troye, but I know she likes you, which means she’ll be into whatever you do. Just do what feels natural. As for Troye, you don’t have to worry about him either. Since you’re both there for Quinn’s pleasure. All you need to focus on is her.”
“Right. Yep. Focus on Quinn.” I have no idea what else to say, so I add a nod. Mirroring me, Noah does the same, then adds.
“That is unless …”
“Unless?”
“Unless you want to focus on him, too … a little bit.”
