Page 47 of Desert Loyalties
I killed them.
Strong arms wrap around me, pulling me tight. I’m still sobbing, gasping between apologies I can’t form, but he just holds me, grounding me. He lowers us both to the floor, and I don’t fight it, I sink into his lap, like I’m not this cracked, jagged thing he’s trying to carry.
He doesn’t speak at first. Just breathes with me. Let’s me cry.
Then, his voice comes low and steady in my ear once my shudders wear off. “Do you remember Jacob Nelson?”
The name punches through my haze, ripping me from the spiral just enough for my brain to catch.
“Yeah,” I whisper confused. My throat is raw. He… he tried to roofie me at that party in college. My friends showed up before anything could happen, thank God. But I couldn’t go to the administration. Not with my rep. I was the party girl. They’d have said I asked for it. The memory is sour. Rotting in the back of my head for years. I had to walk past that smug bastard every day, like nothing ever happened.
“I broke every finger he used to hurt you. And then I killed him.”
My breath catches. My body goes still in his arms. How did he even know.
“I killed him because he hurt you. Because he would’ve done worse. Because you were alone, and no one did anything. So, I did.”
The weight of it settles around us like smoke.
I should be afraid. I’m not. Because I know exactly what he means.
Drake lifts a hand and cradles my face with more gentleness than I think I’ve ever deserved.
“Your grandparents?” he says, voice rough. “They didn’t neglect you. They abused you. Stole from you. Let you rot while they fed their addictions on the money you were owed.”
He leans in closer, his forehead resting against mine.
“If they were alive, if I’d met them, they sure as hell wouldn’t have gone peacefully. Not after what they did to you.”
Tears slip down my cheeks again, slower now, heavier.
“And listen to me, baby.” His thumb brushes the tears away. “No one, no one, is allowed to hurt you. Not them. Not that bastard in college. Not even you.”
I flinch, just a little. But he holds me tighter.
“So, stop blaming yourself. You were a kid. Hurt, angry, abandoned. What you did… it wasn’t murder. It wasn’t revenge. It was the first time you let yourself feel anything. You gave them something they never gave you, mercy.”
I shake my head, but he silences me with a kiss. It’s soft. Not like his usual heat and fire. It’s gentle, sweet.
“I love you,” he says against my lips. “I don’t care how dark your secrets are. They don’t scare me. You don’t scare me. You’re mine. And I protect what’s mine.”
His voice drops to something primal, something dangerous. “Even from themselves.”
And just like that, I break all over again.
But this time, I’m not alone when I do.
Chapter 19
MANDRAKE
We’re at the diner from yesterday. Just talking. Eating. Laughing a little. From the outside, we probably look normal, just a couple killing time before they get back to real life. But inside, I’m anything but calm.
Skye’s sitting across from me, sipping coffee like she didn’t just drop a bomb on me yesterday. We spent the rest of the day talking, about her childhood, her struggles. She told me about Bernadette, her hippy friend who prefers Ben. I can’t really judge; all of my friends are murderers.
I can’t believe she’s been carrying that weight for so long. That guilt, that pain. And I didn’t know. I should’ve known.
When Mickey ran her background, standard protocol for anyone we let close, I should’ve asked. Hell, I helped him with hers personally. But I only looked intoaftershe changed her name. Figured whatever came before, she’d tell me in her own time. That it was hers to give.
