Page 49 of Sol
Dani -- Alhambra
My face burned,and I turned away. “Oohhkay,” I said quietly, embarrassed and rejected. I couldn’t believe Trent said no when I invited him upstairs. After all of those rules I’d processed in my head, all the reasons why I shouldn’t get together with him—once I was willing to break those and ask, he saidno.
And I thought that’s what we talked about in the tetería. I was soconfused.
He reached over and took my hand, clenched it, and let it go. When he spoke, he did it quietly and fervently. “Danika Anderson. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in my entire life. I’ve wanted you for so long. I’m sure you’ve figured thatout.”
I shrugged, attempting nonchalance. But yeah, Ihad.
“There’s nothing I want more than to get you naked.” His eyes closed. “It would be a fantasy. But I’m not gonna do it as your fuck boy. You want a body, any warm body just for tonight, so you can escape and check that off your list of experiences, then move on. I’m not willing to do that for you because I want more than just yourbody.”
“It would mean more than that.” I grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled it. He gently held my wrist and gazed atme.
Opening my mouth to say something more, he cut me off and pulled my hand to his chest. “If you ever want me for a relationship, though, a real one, if you ever let me in, I’ll tear your clothes off so fast you’d wonder why you even bothered wearingthem.”
I took a sharp intake ofbreath.
Coupled with those intense eyes, that was a promise I’d want to seefulfilled.
“No means not tonight, sweetheart. It’s up to you to decide if andwhen.”
The only way I could respond to that was to nodmutely.
He dropped my hand and continued, “But I also said that I’d give you anything.Anythingyou needed. And if that’s what you need right now, I’ll do it. I’m telling you, it wouldn’t be a sacrifice. But I wanted you to know where I stood on it. That I rather it mean something to you,too.”
I couldn’t think of anything to say. So I just stared at my shoes, anywhere but his ardenteyes.
Trent gathered me in his arms and hugged me so tight I didn’t know if I could make it up the stairs by myself afterward. He kissed the top of my head and, once I stepped inside, he strode down the street into the summernight.
When I got to my place, I sat outside on my balcony, my feet up on the railing, hoping he’d change his mind and come loping back up my street. I fingered my cell phone, thinking I’d text Lulu. But I thought she’d come down on me for wanting to get together withTrent.
Maybe that was another reason why Ishouldn’t.
Thatman.
He made me feel so wanted. I hadn’t felt that way around anyone in so long. I ran my hands up and down my arms. While the night was balmy, goosebumps popped on my skin as I thought about Trent and how honorable hewas.
And how saying no to me made him all the moredesirable.
Was he right? Did I just want him for hisbody?
And holy hell, he wanted me and I wanted him. He said it. So was that part of the discipline of the army? The ability to hold back, to say no, when you really burned to sayyes?
It made me want him more, even though I couldn’t do what hewanted.
For one thing, his philosophy differed frommine.
Although…
My ex-boyfriend, Brian, was as “spiritual” as they come. Showed you couldn’t judge people by their appearance. Beneath that dreadlocked hair in a man bun was a control freak who dictated which country we went to next, checked my emails and texts, and was in charge of my passport. So much for live and let live. His micromanagement choked me, questioning everything Idid.
That was why I turned off all social media. That way no one could stalk me. I just wanted to be left alone, and I swore I’d never date anyone as controlling ashim.
This was one reason, of course, why I was wary of Trent. He had controlling tendencies, too, I could tell. Hello, he traveled halfway across the world just to findme.
But knowing that it was to deliver Degan’s last words to me? That made it different.Sweeter.
But I still couldn’t read theletter.
