Page 119 of Ambiguous
I’m not sure how long we drive, but when we slow down, I recognize the gates in front of Julian’s house.
And for the first time since I got that email back in my old office, I feel at peace. Jules comes running up to the car and flings open the door before we’ve stopped moving. I stumble out into his arms.
CHAPTER44
Jules
“Hey,” I whisper into the top of Sam’s head as I embrace him. “I’m here. It’s okay. Whatever it is, we can work it out.” I look over his shoulder at Kurt Delmont. We’ve never met before, and I haven’t thought particularly kindly of him over the past couple of months, but I’m grateful he’s brought Sam here now. I raise my eyebrows to ask what happened.
Kurt shrugs. “I’ll let him explain. Just tell him I’ve got his back.”
I study him, and he seems sincere. I nod. “Thanks.”
Backing away from me, Kurt returns to his seat in the car, and it takes off. I urge Sam along and escort him inside.
It’s getting near sunset, and I hope the flotilla outside has dissipated. I peek out through the closed shades, but seeing a few intrepid paparazzi in boats, I keep them shut.
I have a door open, though, and the fresh breeze makes me feel not so trapped.
We curl up on a couch, me stroking Sam’s hair. He doesn’t say anything, and I don’t make him talk. I just hold him until his breathing regulates and he loosens his grip on me.
“Want some water?” I ask.
He nods and wipes at his eyes with the backs of his hands. I get up and bring him a glass of cold water and a damp cloth for his face, then snuggle in behind him. He drains the water, then sags against me. “Tell me what happened,” I murmur.
“I couldn’t do it,” he whispers.
“Couldn’t do what?”
“Kiss Kurt.” His words make my gut twist. “My family ordered me to go be seen with him, to counter the pictures of you and me and the article and everything. But I didn’t want to. I can’t pretend anymore that I want to be with anyone other than you. Because I don’t. You’re the only one I want.”
His words leave me breathless and excited. I shift around so we’re facing each other. His eyes are red, his face is puffy, his hair’s a mess, and he’s never looked more beautiful.
Lifting his chin up with my knuckle, I murmur, “Sam Stone, I need you. I need you like I need to breathe. Like I need to sing. If I couldn’t have you, I don’t know how I could go on. I mean—that’s not some manipulative ‘You can’t ever leave me or I’ll die’ bollocks, but… I’d feel like part of me was missing. You’re it for me. Do you understand?”
“Yes,” he whispers.
“Good. Because I am totally, completely, outrageously, head over heels in love with you,” I say. “Fearlessly, thoroughly in love with you.”
“I love you, too,” he says. “So much that it hurts.”
My smile just might break my face.
He keeps talking, sniffling between words. “I never believed in love—not for myself. I never thought I’d find anyone who cared for me the way you do. Everything seems clearer when you’re around. I feel stable and settled. You make me feel like I matter. Like what I think means something. And you make me feel like I’m not second best, a person who ends up getting left behind. I feel like, together, we can handle anything—the public, my family, whatever comes at us.”
“We can.” I hug him, and he feels so right in my arms. Because he’s supposed to be there. Because he’s my Sam.
We sit together quietly for a few minutes before I tell him about Colin, and then he gets agitated again.
“Today has been the wildest day,” he says. “Apparently Terrill never communicated to the Lighthouse rep that I had recused myself, so she was outraged when I said I had a conflict.”
“And you quit.”
“I did.”
“They rejected my album,” I say.
He noticeably relaxes. “They told you. I found out this afternoon, too, but I didn’t know if you knew, so I felt caught in the middle.”
