Page 56 of Ambiguous
Sam: Jules, you should know. There’s paparazzi outside. You may want to be careful when you leave.
Jules: Thanks
But why didn’t he warn me about himself?
CHAPTER21
Sam
“Breathe in,” the instructor says in her new age hippie voice.
I do.
“Breathe out.”
I do.
I look around the warm, clean, dimly lit studio filled with yoga equipment, with cheerful paintings on the walls. This is my favorite extracurricular activity that I get to engage in on any kind of regular basis. I’m right next to Em, as usual. It’s late, almost time for bed, but she and I go to these evening sessions to help us sleep.
Her eyes are closed. I know this because mine are open and I feel like a cheater. I’m restless, though, and ready for the class to be over so I can go home and stew.
Because there was something off about Julian this afternoon. I can’t stop thinking about it.Him.
Was it something I did? Or is he just being good and not getting too close, respecting my ethical requirements?
I concentrate on my breath.
My job pays for yoga as a benefit, along with childcare, lunches, parking, and vacation days no one ever uses. Yoga helps me align my body and maintain flexibility.
But the whole chill-out vibe isn’t working one bit tonight, because my mind is racing.
Em must sense me shifting around, because she opens an eye and glares at me. “What is up with you?” she hisses. “You’re supposed to be om-ing.”
“I am om,” I insist in a whisper. “I’m all about the om.”
“You’re not at all om.”
No, I’m not.
Thankfully, the hour is up. Our teacher quietly dismisses us, and we all namaste our way out, rolling up our mats and putting away our foam blocks.
When we get to my car, I open the door for Em, and she asks, “Are you going to tell me why you’re so distracted? You’re worse than a cat with a laser.”
“It’s Julian.”
She sighs and gets this dreamy look in her eyes as she settles into the passenger seat. “JH. Have you figured out how you’re going to fall in love with him yet?”
“No. I keep telling you I don’t need to be in love.”
“You keep tellingyourselfthat.”
“And I don’t have time for it.”
“That may be true. You need a job that’s less stress, more fun.”
I shrug. “Yeah, but not too many law firms offer the same type of pro bono opportunities.”
“Yeah, I know.” She gives me a small smile. “You care so much about others. When do you start caring about yourself?”
