Page 63 of Ambiguous
“I will. Will you come over again?”
“Sure.”
We make arrangements, and with a last look, we separate. He walks to his car. I stride over to my own and get in, fighting an urge to follow him. To call after him, because I want him to be mine.
Maybe that’s the fear I should face.
The one of never getting who I really want.
CHAPTER23
Sam
Another evening, another political event. Another night of holding Kurt’s hand and smiling for the cameras. Another group of rich people, celebrities, and politicos laughing loudly and vying for my grandfather’s attention.
Meanwhile, I’m trying to be photographable but not noticeable. That’s a weird balance.
I lean over and whisper into Kurt’s ear, “How many of these are we expected to go to before the election?” I notice his tie is crooked, so I fix it, and he slips an arm around my waist.
He yawns and then morphs it into a laugh. “All of them. It’s not like we have lives.”
“No kidding. I have so much to do at work that these extra events mean sleep is a distant memory.”
Kurt groans. “Sleep. What’s that?”
“Let’s go outside for a minute and see if it’s quieter,” I say, having had enough people walk up to us and say hi. They know us from the ads, but we don’t know them. Still, they shake our hands, smile, take selfies.
We keep holding hands as we move and receive a few curious looks.
“What is so interesting about us,” he mutters.
“Two men displaying mild affection. Must be something to look at.”
“To be fair, I think a lot of het couples aren’t affectionate, at least not after the first little while. So anyone showing love is, you know, sweet. Revolutionary.”
“If only we were in love.”
He shakes his head. “It would make things easier. Too bad it’s never happening.”
“Nope,” I say, popping the P.
As we laugh, my father comes up, drink in hand, gesturing between us. “Keep this up, you two. Dad’s polling strongly with the LGBT demographic.”
“Yay,” I say, trying to make it sound sincere.
Kurt’s more enthusiastic. “Mom’s leading in the polls. This is so cool.”
“Do you have any plans to run for office?” I ask him. He’s mentioned it in the past as a concept, but we haven’t discussed it recently.
He shrugs. “Yeah. I mean, I’ve always been interested in politics.”
“You think you can handle even more rubber-chicken dinners?”
“We’ve certainly had plenty of practice, haven’t we?”
A major donor comes over, interrupting us. I want to ask Kurt what he would think about us breaking up—er, fake breaking up. But making any changes this early in the election cycle is a bad idea. I have to be perfect. Someone voters can point at and go, “See, gay men aren’t scary.” As much as I hate that concept.
Besides, it’s not like anything is happening with Julian. And nothingcanhappen until he gets the album done.
