Page 146 of Things I Wish I Said
I have a moment of panic where I worry she can’t get her hair wet, that she might be pissed I ruined her wig, but when shesurfaces, she’s laughing while one hand clutches the top of her head.
Wiping the water from her eyes, she sends another playful splash my way.
“You sure you want to do that. Last time it didn’t end well,” I warn.
“Okay, truce!” She laughs, treading water, just barely able to stand.
“Come here.” I motion for her to come closer, and when she does, she wraps her legs around my waist and her arms around my shoulders.
My heart beats against hers, strong enough for the both of us.
“I love the ocean,” she says, her words whispering against my damp skin. “There’s something so universally mysterious and powerful about it, you know? There’s no controlling it or containing its wrath when its angry. You could visit the beach a million times, come every day for the rest of your life, and it’ll be here just as it always has—strong, steady, and mysterious—ready to soothe the worst parts of life.”
Her hazel eyes stare out at the long stretch of blue, studying the ocean while I study her, and when she glances back at me, I shiver. “It kind of reminds me of you,” she says.
I swallow. “I don’t have any more secrets,” I say, though the little voice in the back of my head says that’s not entirely true because Ry has no idea her mother asked me to change her mind about treatment.
“You don’t?” Her fingers rake through the bottom of my hair, and I bite back a groan.
“No.” I shake my head.
After grabbing food from some of the nearby street vendors, Ryleigh and I settle back into the sand. Sprawled out on our towels, we people-watch while we eat, waiting for the sun to set and basking in the amiable silence while I try not to dwell on how tired she looks or how she had to stop and take a break on the walk back.
Slowly, the sun dips toward the horizon, and the beach is bathed in a breathtaking symphony of colors, the sky erupting in a fiery blend of crimson, gold, and deepening violet, each hue melting into the next with a painter’s grace.
The surface of the ocean glitters, mirroring the colors with a liquid path of molten light that stretches toward the shore. Silhouettes of palm trees and distant mountains frame the scene, their dark forms contrasting sharply against the vibrant backdrop, while the soft murmur of the waves and the cool evening breeze create an almost magical atmosphere.
“Now this looks like a postcard,” I say.
“Best sunset ever.” Ryleigh leans back on her arms. “My mom’s getting married,” she blurts.
I glance over at her, but she’s staring straight ahead. “They’re engaged?” I ask.
She nods, her mouth tipping into a rueful smile. “I mean, there’s no ring on her finger, and if you’d ask, they might say they’re not, but I overheard them. I heard John propose. I saw the ring, but they’re hiding it from me.”
I place my hand on her back, warming her skin with my palm. “I’m sorry, Ry.”
Finally, she glances over at me, her expression stricken. “They’re waiting for me to die.”
“No, they wouldn’t. You don’t know that,” I say, refusing to believe it. I spoke with Jill myself; I know how badly she wants Ryleigh to fight.
“I so much as heard them say it, and why not?” She gives a little shrug. “It would be a lot easier. It’s no secret I’m not his biggest fan.”
I sigh, pulling her into my arms. “You need to talk to your mom. Tell her you know.”
“Probably,” she mumbles against my shirt, then straightens and composes herself before returning her attention back to the setting sun.
Silence stretches between us, both of us taking in the view, the blaze of fiery orange on the horizon.
“You know, I lied before.”
My stomach sinks, and I turn to her. “About what?”
Her eyes reflect the colors of the sunset, and it takes her a minute to speak.
“About not being scared. Because I am. Scared, I mean.”
I swallow, and my heart kicks. “What are you afraidof?”
