Page 25 of Things I Wish I Said
Chapter seven
GRAYSON
I pull up toour usual spot at the lake. It’s hot and muggy with the threat of rain, not yet dark but the light is fading fast. I park my car in the shadows of the trees and turn off the ignition.
I light up, taking a long drag of my joint, and hold the smoke in my lungs, relishing the burn before releasing it. Even from here, I can make out the faces of my friends. There are more than a dozen people lounging on towels in the gritty sand, drinking beer, and splashing in the water.
It’s what an eighteen-year-old who just graduated high school probably should be doing with their time, but as I watch them from a distance, I feel like an outcast. I’m not like them anymore. There’s not a carefree bone in my body unless I’m high or drunk off my ass, and watching their easy demeanor and wide smiles makes me want to turn right back around and leave.
I never should’ve come.
I don’t belong here with them anymore.
Unsure of whether to stay or go, I recline in my seat, staring up at the roof of my car as I finish my smoke. Twentyminutes later, I’m significantly more relaxed than when I arrived. So much so, the thumping noise outside my car doesn’t even faze me as I sit up and glance through the windshield to find Cameron squatting on the hood of my car.
He taps the glass in front of me with a dumbass grin on his face.
“Hey, motherfucker!” I yell through the pane of glass. “This is a fucking i8. Get the hell off!”
Cameron makes a kissy face, then leaps off the hood of my car.
Even through the calming haze of hash, I want to strangle him.
“Come on, sunshine,” he says outside my door now. “Stop smoking that smelly-ass shit and get your ass out here.”
With a sigh, I pinch the end of my blunt and drop it in my pocket, then grab my baseball cap off the seat next to me and slide it on before I step out.
“Hey, man. Glad you came.” We slap hands and make our way toward the waterfront where I greet several guys all lingering around a cooler stocked with beer. “Take a good look, boys. I know you don’t remember, but this here is our old friend, Grayson.”
I roll my eyes. “Fuck off.”
“I thought I recognized you,” Trent says, pointing.
Beside us, a group of chicks from Lincoln High eye me from their towels, and when I tip my chin at them, they turn to each other and giggle.
“Of fucking course.” Cameron rolls his eyes. “Now that you’re here, we’ll all be going home with blue balls.”
“Just don’t get too fucked up. We need you actually present at the game tomorrow,” Trent says.
“I was present today,” I say, accepting the beer Cameron hands me.
“Uh, your body was there, but I’m not sure I’d call you present,” Trent argues.
“Let’s see,” Cameron says as he counts off on his fingers. “First, you groaned through the first couple of innings while holding your skull like a little bitch so Coach wouldn’t put you in. Second, once he did put you in, you managed to get through an inning by the skin of your teeth, then when we finally really needed you at the plate, you struck out watching.”
“The ump was an ass,” I say with a shrug.
Cameron rolls his eyes. “Right. The ump was the problem. Just like the last game when you got kicked out.”
“Whatever. You’re all here drinking, aren’t you?”
“The difference is we’ll quit after a few, whereas you’ll leave and get fucked up with Dustin and his crew.”
“I’ll be fine, okay?” I snap, knowing I sound as defensive as I feel.
“Whatever you say, man.” Cameron raises his hands in surrender.
“Hey, Grayson,” a soft voice trills behind me.
