Page 18 of The House Guest
That was a letdown; although maybe it was the reality check I needed to squelch any remaining delusion that something could happen between him and me.
“I’m the opposite, actually,” I said. “A serial monogamist. I don’t know how to just casually date someone. If I like him, I get attached, and I want him to myself. If I sense that’s not what he wants, though, I detach myself for fear of getting hurt.”
Dorian leaned his elbows on the table. “How many times have you had to do that?”
“Pretty much every time I’ve had a boyfriend, I’ve broken up with him before he had a chance to do me wrong. At the same time, I don’t like to just date casually. So, there you go. Perpetually single.”
“How do you know when to break up with them?”
“It’s a feeling that I’m getting in over my head. The need to protect myself kicks in.”
“Well, you’re too young to be tied down anyway. You should enjoy your life a little first.”
“I don’t think it’s about age,” I said. “If you find the right person, you find the right person, whether you’re twenty or sixty. But I agree that I could stand to let loose a bit more. I’m definitely too young to be staying in most nights.”
His eyes widened. “You never go out?”
“Well, I wait tables a few nights a week and meet a lot of guys on the job. But I find I’m also not so good at picking up signals. It would be much easier if someone would just say, ‘I’m flirting with you.’”
“Wouldn’t life be easier if everyone gave clear signals? I’m lying to you. I’m cheating on you. I’m using you.Instead, we’re expected to blindly judge people based on instinct, which may or may not be influenced by what wewantto see.”
I nodded. “You’re right. So often I want to see the good in people, but I’m consistently disappointed.”
“So you surround yourself with monkeys instead.” He grinned.
“You’ve got my number.” I winked. “The monkeys in my head are far superior to humans, yes. Although I was forced to work on a human this week.”
“That’s right!” He pointed at me. “The nude portrait.”
“Yep.” I sighed.
“Didn’t go well?”
“It didn’t.”
“Balls weren’t low enough?”
I laughed. “The balls were okay. But apparently, I freeze when you show me a penis.”
He bent his head back in laughter. “I thought you said you were up for that challenge.”
“Yeah, well, I suppose it’s different when you’re slapped in the face with it.”
“Not gonna touch that.”
“Figuratively, of course.” I took a sip of my tea.
“Was he…well-endowed at least?”
“He wasn’t hard. So not sure what his potential would’ve been.”
“Potential. That doesn’t sound too complimentary.”
“Take that how you may.”
Dorian chuckled, and we continued talking until long after he’d finished the last of his tea. He eventually took his mug to the sink and announced, “I haveto get going soon. I try to get into the office by six so I can get some work done before I have to deal with people.”
“You’ve peopled enough in the middle of the night with me.”
