Page 46 of Cast in Shadow
Why did hearing him say my name like that make me feel like a monster?
Casting a sideways glance at Nguyen and seeing the hatred seething in his gaze as he glared at Emerson, I remembered why I was in that little cottage in the first place. It might not have been him who’d kidnapped Shay and Nguyen and tortured them, but it was one of his Brethren.
I latched on to the anger rising in my blood. “I mean it, Emerson. If you or your people have a problem with Lexa, bring it to me directly, without interfering with our missions. And when you do figure out who sent Theloneus through the veil—my money is on Phineas, by the way—I hope you choke on your apology.”
His expression was unreadable, but his eyes had faded back to that intoxicating blue. “How will I find you to raise my concerns?”
Was it an honest question or a taunt? I couldn’t tell, and at that point, I didn’t care.
“I’m sure you’ll figure it out.” With that, I turned on my heel. I hadn’t made it two steps when I felt a gentle nudge at my mental barrier. I eased it down the tiniest bit.
“Knock, knock.”Emerson’s voice coiled through my mind.
I rolled my eyes and ignored his little test. When my team was on the road, with Nguyen riding in the tactical van and me riding in the SUV, I felt that press again.
“I can’t do this with you,”I sent through the connection.
We would never be what we were again, even if I wanted that. Which I didn’t. Too much time had passed. Too many secrets lived between us.
I felt his sigh as if he were sitting right beside me.“You’re mine, Sai. And you always will be.”
Possessive bastard.
Letting my head fall back against the seat, I shut my eyes and eased the connection closed. I was running on emotional fumes and desperately needed to be alone in my own head for a while.
18
Nguyen stared at me from the other side of my desk, his shoulders rolling forward as he pressed his palms into the solid oak. “You should have told me.”
His words came out in such a cutting tone that my first instinct was to sit back in my chair and put more space between us.
Screw that.
I stood slowly, pulling myself to my full height, and met his furious gaze head on. “What happened between me and Emerson is none of your business.”
His brow jerked up, then down. “Isn’t it? You’ve had us tracking him for years. I thought he was a threat to you. But instead, you had your team keeping tabs on your obsessive ex. Do you get how fucked up that is?”
Emersonwasa threat to me. To my heart. To my sanity. To my life.
“Watch it, Nguyen. I’ll give you some leeway after what you and Shay went through tonight, but I’ve got a very short fuse.”Maybe he couldn’t see it through his own turmoil, but my nerves were beyond frayed.
“Yeah, what Shay and I went through. I watched what they did to her, Senna. Watched and couldn’t do a fucking thing.” He shook his head in disgust. “And then you let that monster touch you.”
He sounded like he wanted to be sick. Kind of looked like it, too.
“They or Phineas? Emerson told me he didn’t lay a finger on either of you. He said it was Phineas who kidnapped and tortured both of you, and that he and Jabiah intervened when they got there. Was that a lie?” If it was, I would never forgive him.
Nguyen’s expression turned icy. His upper lip curled, and he flicked the point of one long canine with his tongue. “No,” he finally ground out. “But it was one of the Brethren.”
“And between our resources and theirs, we’ll find Phineas. You have my word that he’ll pay for what he did to you both.”
He shoved away from the desk. “Jesus, Senna. That’s not even the point.” Turning his back to me, he jammed his hands into his sable hair, gripping it tight.
“Is that not what you want? Retribution for the pain he caused?”
His whole body vibrated with the breath he let out. His meaty hands fell to his sides, and then he started laughing. It was a humorless sound, but when he turned, anguish pinched his features. “I’m talking about the pain you caused. We’ve worked together for ten years. Side by side. And I’m just now figuring out that you don’t trust me enough to tell me who he really was to you.”
“It’s not a matter of trust. What he did or didn’t mean to me is my personal business. Not yours.” I folded my arms over mychest. “I asked you to track someone I saw as a threat. Simple as that.”
