Page 83 of The Reckless Love of an Heir
Compassion drew Susan to her feet. Of course Stephen and Gerard must have been closest to William. She did not know the younger boys well, there had been too great a gap in their ages, yet still her heart went out to them. But once she was standing she did not know what to say or do; she could see they would not welcome her embracing them.
‘Thank you, Susan. It would be very kind of you to ring for a fresh pot of tea,’ Henry said.
She looked at him. He knew she had not stood up for that reason; he was saving her from the awkwardness which held her still.
He rose and walked across the room. ‘And I presume you boys would welcome shortbread or whatever treat Cook can send us up. How was your ride?’ His hand settled on Gerard’s shoulder.
‘Good,’ Gerard answered as he turned and briefly hugged Henry.
She had never seen Henry hold his younger brothers. She turned away to call for a maid, heat flushing her cheeks, as though she had just glimpsed something private.
‘Do not worry, Susan.’ Stephen touched her forearm, stopping her. ‘I will walk down to the kitchens and ask, then I may choose whatever Cook has on offer.’ He smiled at her, a natural smile.
‘I’ll come with you.’ Gerard joined his brother and both boys left the room barely moments after they had entered it.
‘Susan.’ Percy bowed his head in greeting. She nodded too, then returned to her seat.
‘How were they?’ Henry asked Percy as they sat.
‘They rode hard, mad for constant races.’
Henry turned his back on Alethea and faced Percy. ‘I have no idea what to do to help them.’
Alethea talked to Sarah and Christine, no one else was listening to Henry and Percy.
‘We are doing what we can.’
Henry nodded, but she could see he did not believe it.
‘What do you think, Susan?’ Sarah asked.
Susan looked at the women, but she was unable to answer because she had not been listening to their conversation. Her thoughts and her heart sat beside Henry and took hold of his hand again.
‘Henry said the funeral is to be in four days, on the Thursday, in York Minster,’ Alethea announced in the carriage on the way home.
‘I shall be going,’ Papa stated.
‘I wish that I could,’ Alethea answered.
‘It is unseemly for a woman to attend,’ Mama answered, ‘and it is hardly appropriate for you when William’s mother and sisters would not.’
‘I only said I wish, not that I would,’ Alethea complained.
But Susan understood where Alethea’s complaint came from, she wished she might be there too. She longed to stand beside Henry.
‘We will go to Farnborough to support Jane and the girls instead,’ Mama answered. ‘We will be there when the men return.’
The house would be full. William’s family would fill the local hotels and inns or stay at his cousin Rob’s. There would be no chance for Susan to speak to Henry alone.
She sighed and looked out of the window, her heart so heavy.
She had not changed her mind, she would find employment and leave. Yet… It did not mean she could bear to watch Henry in pain and not offer comfort.I love him.
21
When Henry stripped off his black evening coat his gaze caught on his reflection in the mirror in his bedchamber. He stared at the image in the flickering candlelight. He had become so used to seeing himself dressed in black his white shirt glowed like a beacon in the shadow-filled room.
He untied the black neckcloth from about his throat as Samson watched from his prostrate position on Henry’s bed.
