Page 2 of The Forbidden Love of an Officer
She had told her sister, Penny, she wished to marry the soldier, not the old Duke.
She should not have written to Paul though, not without permission… Thrusting her feelings of guilt aside, she put his letter down to start her own, sitting before a blank sheet of paper.
Paul,
My father has shut me in my room. I am to stay here until I agree to marry the Duke of Argyle. You would not believe how cruel he was about you. I know he is a Duke, but I have three sisters who may marry whoever he wishes. I choose to marry a Captain. Yes, I will elope with you. Only tell me when! Send word as quickly as you can. I do not wish to stay here another hour even.
I cannot wait to see you. Come and fetch me.
Love, love and more love.
Yours and yours always,
Ellen
Ellen blotted her words, then sealed the letter, dropping a little melted wax onto the folded paper. Then she blew on it to cool it, and waved it in the air. She finished by kissing the still warm wax, before she gave the letter to Pippa.
‘Be careful, do not let anyone see you pass it to Eric.’
‘I shan’t, my lady. Did you wish me to bring you something to eat? I can fetch something from Cook.’
‘No, do not take the risk, Pippa. If my father’s steward or the housekeeper discovered it, you would lose your post and I will never forgive myself. I can manage. It is just a little hunger.’It shall not be for long…
‘Then is there anything else, my lady?’
‘Nothing, Pippa. Go.’
The maid bobbed a curtsy, then left, the servants’ door closing behind her.
Ellen walked over to a chair by the fire and looked into the flames. Her fingers curled into fists as she held on to her excitement.
It was Christmas in a week, mid-winter.
She picked up the handkerchief she was embroidering for her youngest sister, Sylvia, and sat down, then took out the needle intending to sew again, but her hand dropped as anxiety twisted and spun in her stomach. She had felt muddled for weeks – quivery inside. She’d been confused ever since Paul had left in the summer.
Before he left he had slipped a note into a book he was reading aloud to her. It said simply,may I write to you?She had nodded, her heart blooming with relief that his leaving did not mean the end of their friendship.
Paul’s first letter had come with her father’s mail. He had opened it and read it before returning the letter to Paul, telling him not to write to her. There had been nothing condemning in it, no words of love, only facts and stories, but still she had endured a severe interview, and her father had not even known she had given Paul permission to write.
Paul’s second letter, telling her about his first, had come via Eric, a groom, and Pippa. It had still been merely talk, but he’d said he’d taken lodgings nearby for a week or two so he might establish a way to communicate with her. Her heart beat rapidly even at the memory of that first letter. She had thought, surely if a man would go to such lengths, then his feelings were more than mere friendship.
A week later she had ridden out with Penny and Eric, and met Paul briefly. When Penny had met Paul, he had smiled his charming smile and bowed in his regimental way. Penny had been enchanted, and Ellen had liked him even more for being nice to her sister.
She and Penny had walked through the woods with him, at the edge of her father’s land, near his tall, red-bricked folly, and they had all laughed. Laughter was a rare thing in her family. Only when she was with her sisters, somewhere private, did they ever find moments to laugh.
Paul had gone to London after that, but he had continued writing. Mailing his letters to the village inn, addressed to Eric, who had handed them to Pippa. For weeks the tone of the letters had been conversational, but in November it had changed. He had spoken of the summer, and said pretty things about the colour of her eyes and hair, and the fullness of her lips.
A week ago he had written to say he had hired a room at a local inn and asked her to meet him there. She had ridden out with Eric, and not even told Penny, fearing involving Penny if her father found out.
She had known what she wished Paul to say. Over the months since the summer, she had fallen in love with him.
Numerous hours had been wasted ever since she met him, lying on Penny’s bed, or her own, whispering about Paul. Rebecca and Sylvia were too young to be confidants, yet she loved all her sisters, but now, if she went with Paul, she must leave them behind. Loss shot through her heart like an arrow passing through it.
A tear escaped. She wiped it away.
When they met a week ago, Paul had taken her hands and said he loved her, that there was no other woman he wanted, or would want. He had been ordered to go to America and wanted her to marry him and go with him. He had asked for her agreement to speak to her father. She had given it, her heart swelling and bursting with joy.
If she had stopped to think, she would have known her father would never accept a marriage offer from a Captain of the 52nd Regiment of Foot.
