He waited, but only silence greeted him. No murmuring answered from the darkness.
He crawled deeper into the cave, and he realized what he should have from the start.
The cave was empty.
It should not be possible. Once souls were relegated to the mountain of Erebus, demons did not bother with them. These were souls who had lost themselves to guilt and shame, often not even knowing why anymore, and leaving them to their eternal pain was the most effective punishment. They were not taken from Erebus unless it was Kushiel who took them, and only then because their souls had lightened enough to move on from the darkness. It did not happen often, but itdidhappen.
Kushiel backed out of the cave and went on to the next on the outcropping. And then the next. And the next. And the next.
It took hours, perhaps even days, because Kushiel lost all sense of time as he checked cave after cave, eventually covering the entire mountain. If tears streamed from his eyes, and if his hands were bloody, his knees scraped raw, and his wings torn from jagged rocks, he hardly noticed. Because by the time he’d made his way to the bottom, he had accepted the indisputable truth, even though it was impossible.
Erebus was empty.
By the timeKushiel made it back to Limbo, he hardly noticed the lack of burning in his very bones. He felt… empty. He was a void. The lack of physical pain just drew him further away from reality.
His purpose had been taken away. He waited for anger, or sadness, but there was… nothing. Just that emptiness. A yawning chasm inside him.
He sat down, barely conscious of where he was. He knew not how much time passed before he realized a presence had sat beside him. He did not look over.
What was the point?
All that work… All those decades and centuries with those souls. He thought of each one, remembering them. He knew intimately every single one that had been housed in Erebus. He knew the shape and feel of them, the texture of their emotions, the weight of their guilt, and most importantly, the bright pinprick of light that existed hidden under the darkness in each one. He had, in his way, loved each and every one of them. He had shared their pain and suffering, and he had seen beyond it to the possibilities of a future outside of the underworld.
All for naught.
“Is there nothing we can do for him?” a voice whispered.
Kushiel knew that voice, but that didn’t seem important at the moment.
Nothing seemed important at the moment.
“We can just be here for him, little dude. That’s what we can do. We’ll sit here until he’s ready,” another voice replied, and then he felt a hand on his shoulder.
The hand squeezed, and the action was enough to pull Kushiel’s attention to his side.
It was the demon Arioch who had spoken, and in his lap was his mate, Michael. Kushiel had the thought that there was something wrong with Michael being in Limbo, but the thought floated away. They stared at him, and Kushiel had to look away at the pity in their eyes.
“Bruh, are you with us now?” Arioch asked gently.
“Where else would I be?” Kushiel answered.
“You were mourning, I think,” Michael answered calmly.
It was like Michael saying it made it true, because Kushiel doubled over in pain, and for the first time he realized that his cheeks were wet with tears. How long had he been crying?
“They’re all gone,” Kushiel said simply. “What is my purpose now?” he asked, looking at Arioch.
Arioch’s eyes were kind, and that hand squeezed his shoulder again.
“They aren’t gone, bruh. They have been taken from you, but you can find them. I saw it. You’ll go and find them. Someone will help you. I can’t see who, but they’re in the town Michael is from. You’ll get the souls back. You’ll set things to right. That’s your purpose now,” Arioch said, squeezing Kushiel’s shoulder again.
Michael’s town. Yes, because Michael was mortal. He looked sharply at the mortal soul in Limbo, panic overtaking him for a moment. Would Michael be stuck here now?
“It’s okay. I’m allowed to be here. We’re like afterlife Internal Affairs now,” Michael said, smiling slightly. “I can see you panicking a bit over my presence,” Michael clarified when Kushiel raised an eyebrow.
“Yup. Pretty cool job, huh dude?” Arioch said, smiling gleefully. He got serious then. “Anyways, some asshole is fucking with things and causing chaos, which oughtta be mydepartment. The fucker. We’re trying to suss out who. But my only vision so far has said only you can find the missing souls, or recognize them, or something, and that there’s someone who can help you. That’s all I know.”
“It is enough,” Kushiel replied.
