“I don’t… I don’t understand,” Kushiel whispered.
“I know, and I’m so sorry for that,” Yah said, coming around the table and reaching a hand out to Kushiel.
Kushiel stared at it blankly for a moment, and then his hand hesitantly reached out. Yah clasped it in their own, pulling Kushiel up and into a hug. They hugged for a long moment, and Cass could feel his angel’s many emotions—love, confusion, relief, joy, and the tinge of grief that came with a long separation. Cass looked over at Luce, who even looked a little wet-eyed at the apparent reunion.
Eventually Yah and Kushiel separated, and Kushiel stepped back, reaching out to grab onto Cass’s hand, as if to reassure him. Cass sent his love and approval through their bond, and Kushiel looked over at him, smiling with shining eyes.
Yah walked back around and sat, and suddenly two chairs appeared on their side of the table. Cass led Kushiel to them and sat in one while his angel sat in the other, their hands never separating.
“I don’t understand,” Kushiel said again. “I don’t feel pain, and yet…” he motioned to his gray skin and black wings.
“Well, you’ve got a soulmate,” Luce stated, as if that made everything obvious.
Cass huffed at Luce. “I’m really not sure I like you.”
Kushiel looked over at Cass aghast.
“What? He’s the one who orchestrated this whole thing by giving Mammon the idea,” Cass responded. He looked over at Luce, adding, “And I get that this saves Kushiel from the constant pain of giving pieces of himself to others for redemption, but you could have told us your plan. You could have been more helpful about the whole thing from thebeginning, instead of letting Kushiel grieve and all those souls suffer. You could have done things differently.”
“I’m afraid not,” Luce stated. “Free will is very much in play, and with your involvement, there was only so much help I could offer. You may be an oracle and a seer, but you still have choice. So much was dependent on you, Cassius. We could not do more than we did. Is the end result not worth the sacrifice, though?”
“It is,” Kushiel answered, looking over at Cass.
Cass sighed. “Of course it is, but I just wish the end result could have been achieved without hurting Kushiel.”
“As do I,” Yah added. “Kushiel, when I chose you to be the Angel of Punishment, and thus the one who could redeem souls, I did not foresee the toll it would take on you, although of course I should have. I did not foresee the universe lasting as long as it has, though, and my sight was short because of that.”
“We are fixing that, though, my love,” Luce cut in. “We are repairing the cracks in the universe and fixing the things that are breaking down.”
“I still don’t understand why it doesn’t hurt to be here,” Kushiel admitted.
“Your soulmate can visit heaven and hell as an oracle, and thus so can you. You can visit Limbo, and thus so can he. You give each other free passage. You cannot be separated,” Luce explained. “As for your appearance—that was always your choice, Kushiel.”
Kushiel looked shocked at that. “I chose this?” he asked.
Luce shrugged. “In a manner of speaking. You spent so much time with us, and I think you slowly assimilated more to hell, and your outward appearance matched that. The demons accepted you more, and you came to identify more with us. It was not a conscious choice so much as a reflection of what you felt. We always welcomed you with open arms. Of course, you could revert to your original angelic form, but I hope you keepthe pieces of yourself that you got from us. I really do think of you as partly mine. I hope you will not leave that behind.”
Kushiel looked over at Cass.
“I love you just the way you are,” Cass said, answering the unspoken question. “You are perfect.”
“He is,” Yah agreed.
Kushiel smiled then, looking teary all over again.
“What will happen to Mammon?” Cass asked.
“His immortal essence will be redistributed,” Yah answered, gently touching the spear.
“He’s mortal now,” Luce chuckled. “We had to pull out all the stops for that miracle. But it will be so worth it to have him on the other side of things in hell. The hellhound will be sending his mortal soul along shortly, I’m sure. They don’t usually keep their victims for too long.”
“What—” Kushiel started to ask, but Luce cut him off.
“Best not to know details, Kushiel. Suffice it to say that hellhounds make mortal souls who are beyond redemption pay for their sins a bit before sending them on to us.”
“Is that it, then?” Cass asked. “Mammon is dealt with, Kushiel doesn’t need to redeem souls anymore, and we’re soulmates who get to spend eternity together?”
“Kushiel will still have work in Limbo with souls,” Yah told them, “but that does not take such a toll on him. I’m also sure as his soulmate that you’ll make sure he doesn’t give too much of himself to his work.”
