Page 24 of How to Trust a Hellhound
“Fluffy in this form, I think.” I smiled, ruffling his fur when heleaned into me.
“He was feral. He wouldn’t change into a human. He barely even changed into a hellhound. I think it broke your heart every day,” Corbin said softly.
Atlas whined next to me.
“I was fine,” I reassured him. “You needed time to feel safe, to get acclimated. I knew that, and the best thing I could do was show you that I loved you and be there when you were ready to accept that love.”
“You did that for all of us, in whatever way we needed,” Corbin mused. “You were so patient, so understanding, but I think you suffered for us. Worried about us. Sacrificed for each of us.”
“It was no sacrifice,” I rumbled gruffly. “You’re my boys, and every one of you is worth everything to me. You’re pieces of my soul walking around outside of this vessel, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. You have all been a gift.”
Corbin nodded. “Yes, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t hard. I don’t think any of us ever got how hard it was.” Corbin smiled then. “None of us were ever the best at being patient and not taking action.”
I chuckled, thinking back to some of their antics as pups. Corbin was probably the most patient of all of them, but they had all favored action.
“You were never any trouble. None of you were,” I reassured them both.
Atlas changed into his human form, and Corbin raised an eyebrow, obviously shocked at the transition. I just put my arm around his shoulders where he sat next to me.
“You’re worried about Josh,” Atlas murmured quietly.
I sighed. “I know that sometimes waiting is necessary. It’s hard, and it’s a struggle, but I can’t force things. Hellhound or human, each being must come to their own place of self-discovery. Josh is on his way, and I can’t rush him. I wouldn’t want to rush him. He’sbeginning to trust me, and I cherish each moment I get to spend with him.”
“He already trusts you,” Atlas rumbled.
Corbin hummed in agreement.
“He avoids me,” I murmured. “I understand why, and I respect the space he needs.”
“He might have needed space before, but is that what your instinct tells you he needs now?” Corbin asked.
I thought that over. Ididhave a hard time leaving Josh this morning. I hadn’t wanted to let him go, but I’d thought that had been my own neediness.
“He is human,” Atlas grunted. “Sometimes they need ‘therapy.’”
Corbin nodded, adding, “It’s more than him being human, though. You treat Aiden and Toby and Quinton just like you treat us. We’re all your children. He isn’t your child, though.”
I smirked. “Do you think I’m so unaware of myself that I don’t know that? What I feel for Josh isn’t fatherly.” My smile faded. “But he still needs to heal.”
“Mates help each other heal,” Atlas said. “He needs to be needed, too.”
Corbin and I both looked at him, and Corbin smirked. “Well, looks like Fluffy has some good advice.”
Atlas reached over to smack Corbin on the head, and Corbin smacked back at him. I ignored their mild squabbling as they started to roll around and wrestle.
Joshhadneeded space—I was sure of that. But perhaps I was ignoring my instincts and the time to give him space was over. I understood the point my boys were making. Partnerships were equal, and Josh couldn’t feel like I was treating him like a child.
Maybe I needed to make my interest in him known. I wasn’t sure if he was ready for that… but I trusted my instincts, and my instincts were telling me that I needed to see Josh before this evening.
The crows were scrabbling about and cawing as Atlas andCorbin continued to roughhouse. I winced as Corbin elbowed Atlas in the face, then Atlas kneed him in the stomach. Some things really never changed. Corbin was usually so sedate, but I could always count on Atlas to bring out the playfulness in him.
“Boys,” I said, and they both stopped and looked up at me. They were covered in dirt and grass, and there was a wee bit of blood—I wasn’t sure whose. “Perhaps you should both head out for a hunt? Get rid of some excess energy?”
They looked at one another, and then they both got up. Corbin brushed himself off, then Atlas shook himself off, flinging some dirt and grass back onto Corbin. I tried not to laugh as Corbin shot Atlas a dirty look.
They managed to stalk off without any more fighting, the crows following.
I sat for a moment longer. I ‘d been in fatherly mode for so long, but Corbin was right. Josh wasn’t a child, and I couldn’t treat him like one. With that thought, I headed back through the house to grab my cell phone and keys. When I picked the phone up, I noticed a missed call. That itch under my skin started again. I hit redial.
