Page 62 of Above
I knew that wasn’t right though. I did care. I always would. That was part of the problem. I didn’t know how to stop the pulsing organ in my chest from guiding every decision I made.
A splash in the water stopped me in my tracks. Had he just done it? Dove under the water and ended himself? Despite my better judgment—again—I turned.
But, no, he had not gone under. Altair had only rotated and came forward, now only in knee-deep water. I didn’t want to deal with him. Didn’t care to speak to him. But there was an unsettling edge to the confused and pointed look he was giving me. His eyes were ever so slightly scrunched, lids appearing heavy. Both pale brows were so tightly knitted together that they almost appeared to be one. A slight frown was tugging at the corners of his mouth, revealing those deep dimples on his cheeks.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked, unwilling to go without knowing. Crossing my arms and leaning onto my left leg, I waited, not sure he would offer the answer.
“What?” he asked, voice impossibly heavy and slow for only saying one word. Again he stared, so clearly confused. Did he somehow not recognize me? I was wearing my cloak, but even with my hood on my hair dominated the space, peeking out and making me hard to miss. Was he drunk?
“Are you okay? What are you doing?” I stupidly questioned. Why, I didn’t even know. I didn’t care. Still, I stood there, my head tilting as I looked at him.
In a surprisingly earnest way, he lifted some sort of glass bottle and replied, “Drowning my woes, Tershetta. Haven’t you ever done that?”
So he did recognize me.
I took a guess that he meant drinking and not truly drowning, but who knew.
“Thankfully, no. A bit too expensive for me. Haven’t got the coin to spare.” At that, he seemed shocked, his jaw slackening and brows rising. Maybe that was what being rich was like. Not knowing others couldn’t afford things you didn’t think twice about splurging on. It had never seemed that way with wealthy eadi, but maybe that was because they knew how lucky theywere. “Well, I’ll leave you to drown yourself in liquor and the sea.”
“I’m not going to kill myself.”
“Oh sure, definitely not what it looked like. Can’t talk, sorry, I’m running late.”
He took a large step toward me, now nearly out of the water, the movement of his body somehow menacing in its stiffness. I froze in place, whatever lighthearted and sarcastic mood that had existed between us moments before gone. In its place resided something dark and consuming. A feeling that terrified me more than I was willing to admit. Which was why I forced my breathing to slow and my face to remain calm, not showing him what he might capitalize on.
“I could kill you,” he muttered, his tone off. Dull and almost unsure. “I should kill you. You’re better off that way. Dead.”
“Yes, yes, so you’ve said many times,” I groaned, annoyance mingling with the fear within me. “Honestly, I’m a little tired of hearing you say that all the time when I’m still here, standing. Miraculously, the only time I came close to death, you chose to save me. I’m starting to wonder if maybe you don’t want me dead after all.”
That wasn’t true. I knew he wanted me dead—had a feeling that he wanted it to be by his hands. A spectacle. Something that would further push the false belief that of eadi were mistakes. That we didn’t belong in the elites. He wouldn’t waste the chance to prove himself. He was smart, conniving, cunning, and desperate for redemption. With his father so clearly falling from grace, he had a lot to prove.
“All you do is ruin this place. You ruin everything. For everyone.”
“Do you mean all of eadi? Or are you specifically talking about me? And who am I ruining everything for? All the shaytan? The elites? The trainees?” A growl of what had to berage freed itself from the cage of his mouth, sounding more beast than person. I didn’t stop though, not when I was finally getting to him. “Or is it you in particular I am affecting? Has the precious prince of shaytan found himself suddenly alone and realized that he’s nothing more than a self-appointed figurehead just waiting to be knocked over?”
When he merely stared at me, unmoving other than the grind of his jaw I could see from my place feet away, his fists clenched at his sides and water soaking him from the waist down, I knew I had struck true. He wasn’t worth any more breath, not when he now knew that someone saw him for what he really was.
“Goodbye, Snake. Remember not to swim when you go under.”
“I already said I’m not going to kill myself.”
“Maybe you should. You’ll never live up to those expectations of yours. Regardless, I have somewhere to be.” I turned, walking away, proud of myself for once.
I heard him sloshing around and, at first, didn’t acknowledge exactly what he was doing. That was, until the pounding of his footsteps on the sand—thedrysand—hit my ears. I whipped around in time to see him lunging for me. He grabbed me, his hands gripping my neck and jaw, holding me tightly as he shadow walked us.
We appeared in a dark alley, the open area beyond lit by glowing lights and surrounded by towering glass buildings. People everywhere laughed, screamed, drank, and danced. The Star District.
“What’s wrong with you?” I croaked, fear swirling in my chest and making me stutter as my eyes frantically searched for a way out. Should I shadow walk? Could I do it with such little room for focus?
“There she is,” he cooed, a smile overtaking his face. I could see now that his cheeks were flushed and his under eyes werehollow, whiskey leaking off his breath. “My terrified Little Void. I like you best this way.”
“You don’t like me at all.” Altair’s thumb stroked my jaw, my skin tingling beneath his touch as his smile widened enough to show his dimples.
“No, I think I do. And I’ll like you even more when you’re dead at my feet.”
Rage turned my vision red, and suddenly, I wasn’t afraid anymore. I was fucking furious. I shoved my face forward, my forehead connecting with his nose with a loud crack. He cursed, blood pooling down his face, dripping off his pointed chin. I used the opportunity to bring my knee up between his legs, my hands digging into his shoulders. Altair crumpled, the alcohol stealing the endurance he normally had and allowing him to crash to the ground.
I looked down at him, his all black uniform decorated with silver snakes, his hair perfect despite having been halfway into the sea. Blood dripped down his cheek, pooling on the gravel below and coating his long fingers, which, as always, were full of silver and black rings. Some of them snakes, others skulls, some stars, and a couple nothing but a plain band. Another sign of his wealth. Immaculate persona, but I knew the truth. I knew who Azazel Altair really was.
