Page 103 of Rhymes with Metaphor
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At his defence, Regwas marinated, basted in his own juices, grilled over the coals, nicely charred, bitten into, and, in the end, found to be well done.The chair was particularly critical, stating that most of his poems were “too much of the moment” and “lacking introspection.”
As soon as Reg could decently take his leave, he’d gone straight back to Joel.
“Did you get anything else pierced while I was gone?”said Reg.
Joel laughed.“No.How was your defence?”
“That old thing?Piece of cake.”
“When do you find out if you passed?”said Joel.
“Already have.I did.”
“They told you right away?”
“No.They sent me into the hallway for twenty minutes to make me sweat.Then they told me.”
Joel hugged him.“What happens now?”
“Now, I must make corrections to my thesis to pacify the chair and then resubmit the manuscript by the end of the month to avoid paying tuition for an extra semester.”
Joel let him go.“Reg, it’s the twenty-seventh.”
“So it is.”
“How many corrections do you need to make?”said Joel.
“They’re negligible.”Reg flipped through the copies of his thesis that the examiners had written on.The chair’s copy was marked by an excessive amount of red-penned comments.“Fairly negligible.What have you been up to while I was gone?”
“Come and see.”
Joel led Reg to the study.
“I can see the floor,” said Reg.“How did that happen?”
“I bought some organizers.Your academic files are in the stack of boxes in the corner, and your notebooks are in the box by the door.I’ve arranged them chronologically from oldest to newest.I collected all your documents in that folder.You’ve got too many books for a shelving unit.Getting a bookcase and putting it in that corner would be more efficient.I’ve measured the dimensions, so you’ll know what size to get.”
“But...”Reg was at a loss.“How will I find anything if I know where everything is?”
“If you know where everything is, you can find it,” said Joel.
“That’s not how it works, Joel.”
“That’s exactly how it works.You wanted me to clear the study out.”
“Only enough to get your bed in.I didn’t know you’d go berserk.”
Reg went to the recliner by the window and stooped to move the books off the seat, but they weren’t there anymore.Nothing was there anymore.The room looked so empty.
“I’m sorry,” said Joel.
“Look, I haven’t shared a place since I lived with Martin at boarding school.And we didn’t get into each other’s things or on each other’s nerves, except he did have this tendency to make smells when I was trying to study.”
“Would it make you feel better if I farted?”said Joel.
He said it with such sincerity that Reg burst out laughing.
