Page 31 of Miss Desirable
“I’m still an idiot,” he replied, his smile crooked. “You are wroth with me, and I understand that. You suffered terribly for daring some pleasure, but can’t we put the past to rest, Catherine?”
She had not dared pleasure. She’d been lured, step by step, from the path of safety. She’d been seduced, as ignorant, lonely girls had been seduced by arrogant cads from time out of mind. Catherine would likely never have seen the situation clearly, except that she had confessed the whole sorry tale to Mama, who had become incandescent with rage.
At Lord Fort and at herself.
Mama, I miss you.The sentiment came so quickly and forcefully that Catherine wanted to order Armbruster from the house and demand that he never inflict himself on her again.
But no. Fort Armbruster had a long memory for slights, and to him, a former lover turning up difficult would be a slight.
“The past has a way of coming back to life,” Catherine said. “Mama often said that half of diplomacy was recalling which secrets to forget and which to hint at and when.”
“Was Lady Fairchild a spy? One doesn’t mean to be insulting, but that’s a shrewd remark.”
“I would not have known what Mama got up to when she wasn’t hosting Papa’s entertainments, or waiting for him to return from some overseas assignment. The whole diplomatic corps struck me as a keen and noticing group.”
Too keen, too noticing.
“Do you miss those elegant parties? The clever conversation?” His lordship’s unspoken question was,Do you miss me?
Catherine did not. Hadn’t for years. “I met many interesting people abroad, but no, I do not miss the sense of rootlessness. The forming of attachments just as one is expected to leave for a new posting. The same adjustment with languages, with customs, with fashions. My parents had the knack for it, while I just wanted a dog.”
And she’d got Fort Armbruster’s flirtation and fumbling instead. A sorry bargain.
“Should I bring you a puppy, Catherine?”
Xavier Fournier already had, a splendid puppy with great big teeth. “No need. If Caesar and I suit, I can find myself a replacement when his owners reclaim him. I do appreciate your call, Fort, but you must not let me keep you.”
Condolence calls were to be kept short. Besides, Catherine needed to decide what to wear to the MacKays’ dinner. Bettis would argue with her about her hair, then spend an eternity doing her hair however Bettis pleased anyway.
“You always were more prone to solitude than other girls,” he said, finishing his shortbread. “I will call again, Catherine, even though you might not find the delight in my presence you once did. That’s normal, given our past, but now is precisely when a friendly face, somebody who truly knows you, can be a boon. Mama is still trying to marry me off, and it would not hurt your cachet to be seen on my arm.”
Merciful God.“You would escort me?”
“I’ve always been fond of you, beyond fond, but I did not feel I could offer for you honorably all those years ago. I was under the impression you understood the limitations upon me as a younger son on the outs with his family and his creditors.” He affected a look of guarded woundedness, as if Catherine was to doubt the facts of her own history simply because they offended his vanity.
He hadlaughedat her fondest dream. Hugged her and patted her shoulder.
“And now, my lord?”
If he professed undying love now that Catherine was wealthy, she would be hard put not to go off into whoops. Even for Fort, that would be doing it a bit too brown.
“I thought you could use a friend. Not all of Society will be happy that your sorrow has been leavened with good fortune.”
“Very few know of that good fortune.”
“And those few have not kept their mouths shut, my dear. If you ever have need of my good offices, you have only to ask.”
Just a few years ago, he’d been a stripling sent away in disgrace, but time had been kind to Fortescue. An uncle had left him a competence, he’d learned some discretion, and his older brother’s marriage remained childless.
For a flickering instant, Catherine considered humoring Lord Fort.I could do worse. Perhaps taking a titled husband—this particular titled husband—would ensure her past remained a well-buried secret. Marriage to Armbruster would also ensure that Catherine’s husband would never be able to deceive her with professions of tender sentiment.
Perhaps Fort had grown up.
And perhaps pigs would take to the skies over Hyde Park. This was Lord Fort, despoiler of innocents and bounder of the first water.
He rose and drew Catherine to her feet. “I know your opinion of me is not what it once was, Catherine, but I am your friend, and you matter to me. I was a foolish young man, and I behaved abominably, but I can do better now. If you are ever in difficulties, no matter how insubstantial, you must apply to me. I know how to be discreet, and I do have connections.”
He bowed correctly and only then pulled his gloves from his pocket and slipped them on.
