Page 27 of Falling for Her Highland Steward
“Milady,” he said, frowning, “I know that I surprised you with my proposal. Indeed, I startled myself, and of course, it is rather sudden, so I am not surprised at your reaction. Please take some time to consider it—at least until the end of your mourning period. I can be patient, and in the meantime, perhaps we can spend more time together becoming acquainted.”
“My mourning period does not end for two months, M’Laird,” Erin reminded him. She saw the maid bringing in the next course of the meal, and suddenly the thought of food made her stomach turn over, but she smiled. “Nevertheless, I will consider your offer.”
“You do me a great honor,” he replied. “I had not intended to propose marriage tonight, but when I saw you—” He broke off and shrugged, looking awkward and a little embarrassed.
Erin followed him back to the table. Surprisingly, although she ate little, she enjoyed their conversation, although she encouraged him to talk mostly about himself. By the end of the meal, she knew almost everything there was to know about his estate and his family, and she was reasonably comfortable with him. Perhaps marrying Laird Grieve would not be such a bad idea, she reasoned. She had heard of many worse men, such as Laird Robert Mackie, a serial adulterer.
When the meal ended, Laird Grieve stood and bowed to her. “That was excellent food, and of course, excellent company, milady,” he said gallantly. “Now, if you will excuse me, I must leave. Shall I see you at the market in town next week?”
“Indeed you will.” Erin smiled at him. “But it is too late for you to leave now, M’Laird, and it has begun to rain. I will have a room prepared for you.”
“If you are sure it is no trouble, milady.” He frowned. “I would hate to put you to any inconvenience.”
“Think nothing of it.” Erin summoned a senior manservant and ordered a room to be made up for the laird.
“Thank you, milady.” He smiled at her. “Goodnight and sleep well.”
“Goodnight, M’Laird.” Erin watched while he was shown to his chamber by a maidservant, but halfway up the stairs, he turned and smiled at her. She smiled back. Laird Grieve was a pleasant man if she ignored the fact that he had maneuvered his way into eating dinner with her and made it impossible for her to refuse him a bed for the night. However, something was missing.
As soon as she saw Caillen that morning, Erin realized what it was.
She had breakfasted alone with Logan since Caillen had tactfully stayed out of the way and had eaten in his own quarters. He spent the entire time thinking about Erin and Laird Grieve and wishing he could be a fly on the wall so that he could listen to their conversation.
After the meal, the laird bowed to Erin and made his way to his carriage, but not before kissing her hand and looking deeply into her eyes. “I expect an answer soon, Milady Erin, be it aye or nay, but please do not keep me in suspense for too long. I do not think I can bear it.”
This was too much flattery, and Erin had to struggle not to laugh. “I will do my best not to keep you waiting, M’Laird,” she answered with a curtsy. “Goodbye.” She heard the carriage roll out of the castle, but she had already turned away. Caillen was walking toward her, and that was when she knew.
The mere sight of his big, broad-shouldered, muscled body shot a jet of desire straight to her core. She felt herself moisten and her nipples harden; Logan Grieve had not had this effect on her, and he never would. Neither did any other man she had ever met. However, she had never desired Nairn, and their marriage had been relatively happy. Perhaps she would be content with Logan.
“Good morning,” Caillen greeted her pleasantly. “Did everything go well?”
“Come into the study.” Erin looked stern as she led the way.
Caillen realized that something momentous had happened the night before. He sat down and waited patiently while Erin paced the room for a short while, then took her seat behind the desk. She put her hands over her face. “He wants to marry me,” she said at last. There was a pause before she looked up, her expression troubled. “What shall I do, Cal? He is not a bad man, or at least he doesn’t seem to be. I am seriously considering saying yes.”
At the word “marry,” a dart of jealousy shot through Caillen.Hewanted to marry Erin. He would cherish her as she deserved to be cherished, love her as she deserved to be loved…but what did he have to offer her? Nothing. Whereas Laird Logan Grieve had a whole estate and no doubt plenty of money to go with it. He could give her a wonderful wedding, beautiful clothes, jewelry, and everything else she desired, perhaps even more children. Suddenly, he felt worthless. But she had asked him a question. He took a deep breath and answered as best he could.
“I think you should be very careful,” he advised. “It is only a short time since Nairn died, and your mourning period does not end for how long, two months? I suspect that he is only the first of what will be a long line of suitors, Erin. You are in a precarious position: newly widowed and still vulnerable. Be careful.”
Erin nodded slowly and frowned, considering his words for a moment.
“Yes, but if I have Laird Grieve behind me, I will have considerably more power,” she pointed out. “Our two estates could work together. He could protect Stephen and me until Stephen reaches his majority and is able to inherit the McCaskill estate.”
Caillen shook his head vehemently. “No, Erin. It is not a good idea. If you want power and protection, this is not the way to get it. I cannot force you to refuse his offer, but I think that instead of receiving power, you will be giving it away. Laird Grieve will have control of two estates until Stephen is of age, and even after that, he will be a very young man and not yet able to make decisions for himself.”
“Will you not still be here to help us?” she asked.
He shrugged. “Will I still be wanted?”
The question hung in the air without an answer. Erin poured them some ale and looked at him over the rim of her goblet. There was something strange about Caillen today. Could it be because of the laird? Was he—she could hardly bear to think the word—jealous? Was he falling in love with her?
She had not realized that she was staring at him until Caillen waved his hand in front of her face to jerk her out of her daze. “I am sorry, Cal,” she breathed. “I am so mixed up. I thought that after you came to help me, the situation at the estate would settle down, and Stephen and I could live a tranquil life. That is really all I want. I had not considered marrying again, at least, not until a few years had passed.”
“I cannot guide you, Erin,” Caillen said sadly. “This is a decision only you can make.” He drank his ale, then stood up. “Are you coming to see some tenants with me today?” His voice was hopeful.
“Of course,” Erin stood up. She felt frustrated and angry. “It is my duty, after all. Dammit, I wish that man had never come to see me!”
“Cal!” Michael’s voice was warm, and he was smiling as he greeted his old friend in the abandoned shepherds’ hut, which they always used for clandestine meetings. It was cold, but Michael had lit a wood fire in the grate, and they had both brought blankets to wrap themselves in. They had used this place many times, both to talk over matters of importance and to spend time as friends. It had been used as a place of refuge, a drinking den, and occasionally even a place to bring ladies for “a cuddle,” as Michael so delicately put it. Michael was quite a number of years older than Caillen, but they were both bachelors, both without any responsibilities, and the world was their oyster.
