Page 2 of Mistletoe Misses
“I’m leaving next weekend.”
My hand falls to the nearby railing. “Leaving to go where? For how long?”
“Los Angeles … indefinitely.”
“You’re moving away from Ember Falls and me? Why?”
She hiccups and swallows down the emotion she’d let loose in my arms earlier, and her eyes harden with finality. “You love this town. It’s in your blood, but I need more than Vermont or even Boston can provide. And you want a big family. I’m not even sure I want to have kids.”
“You don’t want a family? Since when?”
“As long as I can remember.”
“How come you never mentioned it?”
Her head tilts like I’m stupid, and that’s exactly how I feel. “Because you would’ve tried to convince me otherwise, and I would have let you. Maddox, I have dreams and goals, and I’m not ready to set them aside.”
“You’re dumping a lifetime of us for a career that’s not guaranteed? Do you think a family would hold you back? ThatI’dhold you back? I’ve been nothing but supportive of you becoming an actress. I go to every singing gig. I’m your biggest fan.”
“It’s not that.”
“What is it, then?” I lean against the rail, needing support to keep from dropping to my knees.
“Maddox, you have my heart. It’s just—”
“Not enough.”
“I’m sorry.”
Sadness wavers in her voice, and I go to her, hoping I can change her mind. Every time I picture my future, she’s there. We’ve been together in one way or another our entire lives. I don’t know how to be me without her.
“Don’t do this, Carmen.”
“I have to. I need to try, or I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”
“What about giving up on us? Will you regret that?”
The lights reflect off the unshed tears in the deep blue pools of her eyes, and I’m drowning in them. I have no idea how she’ll answer. I suddenly doubt her feelings for me, the depth of ourrelationship, and my worth to her. For the first time, I doubt us, and it rips me in two.
“I already do.”
“Then don’t destroy what we’ve built.” I take her hands, and her forehead drops to my chest. A sliver of hope takes flight, and I spout off every idea that comes to mind, praying something will resonate. “I’ll wait for you. I’ll come visit often. We’ll be together as often as we can. Or I’ll move to California.”
Her head shoots up, and she separates from me again. “No.”
“No?”
“We won’t have the money to fly back and forth, and there’s too much of this place in who you are. I can’t be the reason you lose that or put your life on hold.”
A chuckle squirts out of me at the absurdity of that statement. “Carmen, either way, my life comes to a screeching halt if you leave. This town means nothing if you’re not in it.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“I do.” My trembling hands scrub over my face with a sigh. I can’t believe this is happening. “I only love it here because it made us.”
“Maddox …”
“I want you to chase your dreams, Carmen. You deserve that. If you must leave town to do it, don’t leave me, too. We’ll figure out a way to make it work.”
